[PC] Yume Nikki - "FC Field" by Rwars

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Other
Game: Yume Nikki
Console: PC
Title: FC Field
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Rwars

[attachment deleted by admin]

[Rwars]

woa a song from yume nikki that's an actual song

[Olimar12345]

Nice work (btw I started Yume nikki recently).

-I would recommend re-spacing the systems on page 1, since there's a lot of empty space towards the bottom of the page.
-In addition to this, you could add a system to the last page (since you have plenty of room) and make all of the systems four bars long. Not only would it give each measure more room to breathe, it would also make it consistent with the first page and a half.
-I'm not a fan of the way you've used the rehearsal markings. I get that you're trying to use them to show that it repeats sections of the piece that are the same, but if someone told you to "start at letter A" you wouldn't know which one they were talking about. I'd either continue the letters alphabetically or just remove them entirely.
-Your composer/arranger names aren't aligned all the way.
-Starting at measure 33 the LH does not play the layer 1 chords (I'm getting deja vu). They do not return until the D.C.
-At measure 41 you can move the quarter notes in the RH down an octave and put it in the LH now that the chords are gone. This will actually make the RH manageable.

Check this file out:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/29lu33w1maunxv4/FCField12345.mus?dl=0

[Rwars]

Wow, I ended up uploading an old unpolished version of the mus instead of the current one, whoops haha, hopefully this new one fixes everything?

[Olimar12345]

You uploaded the wrong PDF. Also, that version still has some misaligned notes. Use this:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/y0ugrmnyyewpby9/FCField123456.mus?dl=0

[Rwars]

Alright, done.

[Olimar12345]

Looks good now!

[Latios212]

Nice sheet! Just to clean up, please put up with me for a moment as I point out some things to keep in mind about the layout now and for future sheets:
- Your header info as well as copyright are all currently outside the preset margins. While using the Text Tool, right click those and select "Edit Frame Attributes", and make sure the V (vertical) number is set to zero.
- Similarly, while the staves all lie within the page margins, the staff braces are not, skewing the appearance of everything on the page to the left. One way you can change this is by using the Page Layout Tool. Right click and select "Edit Margins", and insert a small value (around 0.1 looks right) to nudge the everything the correct amount to the right.
- Uniform spacing between systems isn't always the best solution, because objects have varying distances from the staves. Here, the second system doesn't have the eighth notes beamed upwards like the third and fourth systems do, so alotting it a same sized gap after the first system results in a disproportionate amount of whitespace. You'll generally end up with more visually pleasing results if you manually adjust the spacing between systems that have objects at different vertical levels.

Spoiler

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[close]

These are small things, but paying careful attention to spacing in the layout can really make a difference in how polished your sheet looks. I would recommend updating the template you're using.

Another optional thing you may want to consider is using the extra space you have on page 3 instead of pushing 5 systems onto page 2. This would also result in a section break across the page break. See if you like.

[Here's a file with the updated layout.]

[Olimar12345]

Bump for arranger. While the things Latios posted about aren't necessities (although they are highly recommended), we at least need some sort of response from you before we can accept this.

[Rwars]

I swear to god thought I did respond, but I guess not. Sorry about that. I've updated the submission with Latios' copy.

[Latios212]

No problem! Good to go now.

[Zeta]

This submission has been accepted by Latios212.

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot