The most awful jokes you know

[Bubbles]

Why shouldn't people argue?

Arguments themselves aren't an issue on NSM, it's the negative turn they always seem to take here. You can debate any subject perfectly fine without using sarcasm or personal attacks. Everyone here should know by now what might cause anger (don't pretend you don't, but if you seriously don't I'd be glad to tell you in a pm) and how the way it's expressed normally only causes more tension.

With negative attitudes and frequent fights no one new would want to join and contribute, and as we've seen lately people eventually outgrow nsm and leave. You can't push away possible new members by making too afraid to join since that would cause the whole site to eventually die. Also, the disguise of an internet base hides the fact that someone you're fighting could be literally 5+ years younger than you. Imagine that happening in person, why would a 18 year old get in a debate with an 11 year old? I'm not saying it's okay to attack someone of your own age group, you can discuss any topic with no toxicity. I understand why expressing your feelings is necessary and healthy. It just doesn't need to be at the expense of another person.

tl;dr:
Be mindful that you're in a community of varying ages and backgrounds. People aren't going to take to heart and change their lifelong opinions because of something some person yelled at them on a music forum. Being the elder doesn't give you automatic authority either: everyone always has room to grow, and the best way to learn is by observing not immediately thinking "this person is sf wrong wth are they even saying". It's very rare you'll change someone's opinion if they've grown up strongly believing it, so don't get violent when trying!

still too long; just read this:
Seriously though if you really need to rip someone apart just do it outside of the forums, don't make the mods deal with it.

[braix]

Why shouldn't people argue?
These people are going to interact on NSM for other reasons still. The old adage of "if you don't interact with it they'll go away" works for people you're interacting with on YT and elsewhere because that's the only interaction you have with them; however, on NSM, when people butt heads over politics and religion and the like, that's only a small subsect of the NSM forums. They typically are still interacting with mods whom they disagree with but they don't care because they're talking about arrangements and music. That's one of the beautiful things about music; it brings people together whom otherwise wouldn't want to be anywhere near each other.
That having been said, letting the tension build up by NOT letting people express their opinions is a bad idea, though it is sometimes necessary when things turn from debates (polite or otherwise) to shit flinging contests.
That's also a point; debates can be impolite and still be debates (and I'm only speaking in terms of definitions, not what's allowed on NSM). Look at just about any religious debate with Richard Dawkins or Christopher Hitchens; they're still intellectual debates, even when things get heated.
That said, for social reasons we don't allow debates when they get heated (officially, anyways), for better or worse. But it's important to realize that even if things get heated there can still be good points made and the like.

People may argue. There's nothing wrong with that.
Things may get heated and there will still be good points. There's nothing wrong with that either.

When you start to add more people to the equation is when things could start to get difficult. I'm not discouraging debates or encouraging everyone to start ignoring people. I'm merely suggesting ways to prevent the all-out fights.

Consider the following scenario: Two people on NSM are having a debate, and things start to become heated. Normally this would be alright. But there could be maybe 10 other members reading the debate at this time. Things start to heat up, and someone else decides to join the debate. Then another. It's still alright at this point, since it's still just a debate. A post in a heated debate gets misinterpreted as a personal attack. Somebody gets mad. They retaliate. Things get out of hand from here until somebody steps in.
The kind of scenario above is the thing we need to avoid. I'm not necessarily telling you to follow these steps for every single post you make. Just consider possible reactions to what you say. If it's high risk, it may be good that you don't say it.

If there is a rational reason for it and they can talk about it rationally there wouldn't be a shitstorm in the first place

Here's the thing you should understand: This is the internet, not a group of sophisticated people; there's always people that don't talk about things rationally. This is why Step 2 and 3 in my 'guide' suggested to analyze and correct. This is to help with thinking rationally, since most a lot of us here don't think rationally the first time.


TL;DR:
Think twice before posting, consider risk vs. reward.

[Waddle Bro]

Here's the thing you should understand: This is the internet, not a group of sophisticated people; there's always people that don't talk about things rationally. This is why Step 2 and 3 in my 'guide' suggested to analyze and correct. This is to help with thinking rationally, since most a lot of us here don't think rationally the first time.

You don't have to be sophisticated to be rational, those two aren't rly related to each other. Just good old common sense is enough. What I mean by rational is that you make sense, you add to the conversation and you can talk without attacking anyone. If you can't talk rationally you should stay quiet and not post. Click that preview, check your arguments and if your arguments are shit then click that x

[braix]

If you can't talk rationally you should stay quiet and not post. Click that preview, check your arguments and if your arguments are shit then click that x

This is basically what I was trying to say. To you guys that can be rational, hats off to you. That's why my "guide" was titled for "Shitstorm-Starters"

[Waddle Bro]

If you agree with me then why'd you make this seem like a big deal x)

So imagine how offended said people could get when there IS a rational reason for it

but it's ok though I'm just glad you understand my point now! :]