[DELETED] [3DS] Fire Emblem Awakening - "Chaos" by Maelstrom

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Fire Emblem
Game: Fire Emblem Awakening
Console: Nintendo 3DS
Title: Chaos
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Maelstrom

[Maelstrom]

[Tobbeh99]

Good Job!
A couple of things I've noticed:
1) measure 9-16: maybe you could give those octaves a more dissonant feel by adding a major 7th/minor 9th.
2) measure 57-60 looks a bit messy. Make it instead like this
measure 57: dotted 8th(with staccato)-16th- quarter(with staccato) dotted 8th rest-16th- quarter(with staccato)
measure 58: dotted 8th rest-16th-quarter(with staccato)
The above are the same as measure 59 and 60.
If you feel like a quarter is too long, the use 8th with staccato.
3) That 1/4 in the end is really unnecessary
4) measure 57-61: maybe make that bass play octaves.

[Maelstrom]

1) measure 9-16: maybe you could give those octaves a more dissonant feel by adding a major 7th/major 9th.

I don't quite know about this. It just doesn't sound quite right

2) measure 57-60 looks a bit messy. Make it instead like this
measure 57: dotted 8th(with staccato)-16th- quarter(with staccato) dotted 8th rest-16th- quarter(with staccato)
measure 58: dotted 8th rest-16th-quarter(with staccato)
The above are the same as measure 59 and 60.
If you feel like a quarter is too long, the use 8th with staccato.

Pretty good, but I don't know about the dotted staccato. I've never been a fan of using dotted rests outside of compound/complex time signatures. But it looks so much cleaner, I stuck them in anyway

3) That 1/4 in the end is really unnecessary

Well, it is in the song, unnecessary as it may seem.

4) measure 57-61: maybe make that bass play octaves.

Good idea. I didn't put it in at first because I thougt it might get too low. But just now, I looked at the first page. 
And the links have been updated.

[Bespinben]

This will just be BespinLite™ today -- full package to come eventually:

*M. 1-32 can be treated universally under the key of C minor, the Db's being borrowed from the Phrygian mode and the Gb's being borrowed the Locrian mode.
*M. 33-56 also can fit under the mold of 4/4 as well. I'm usually a fan of sticking with the same time signature throughout unless there is an actual change in meter, not a shift in pulse. This mentality applies to my viewpoint for preferring to "borrow" accidentals instead of changing key signatures as well (like the above).
*This is where BespinLite™ ends -- the spelling of accidentals in m. 33-56. All I can say right now is that you need to be aware of a compositional device called "chord planing" (aka harmonic parallelism). There are 3 chords in m. 33-36, but they are all of the same TYPE -- major 11ths, all composed of root, 3rd, 7th, and 11th (the most dissonant combination of this chord possible [fitting right?]). Knowing this, you can know that m. 36's E natural should ACTUALLY be an Fb, because that is the root that would be provide the tones Ab (3rd), Eb (7th), and Bb (11th) in the right hand.

[Maelstrom]

Probably won't get to this until Monday.
There were some long discussions about the key sig and accidentals a while ago. I'll find some quotes when I get the time

[Bespinben]

Oh don't worry, I'm aware of the discussion that took place. I just wanted to point out that there's ambiguity:

the next section is clearly in 3/4

*M. 33-56 also can fit under the mold of 4/4 as well.

There are 72 beats total in that passage. 72 is divisible by both 3 (72/3 = 24) and 4 (72/4 = 18), meaning that if you wrote it in 4/4 instead of 3/4 it would have 18 measures instead of 24 measures.

[Maelstrom]

I don't know. It really feels more natural in 3/4, imo.

Wait a sec, I'm going to grab those accidental quotes

Nah they're fine. Only thing to comment (if I actually were to look at it thoroughly!) would be the lefthandthing at the second half, where some accidentals kinda go against what's in the right hand, but considering how it pretty much goes chromatical and stuff I think it's fine.

Thought there were some more, but this is all I can find.

[Maelstrom]

Imo, m33-56 just gets nasty when you put it in 4/4. It looks and reads more easily in 3/4. And I really think that 17-32 is really in B flat minor.

Updated

[Maelstrom]

While I spent a large amount of time on this song and all the accidentals, I'm not sure it best exemplifies my work as an arranger.
So I'll submit something better.