[DELETED] [Wii] Mario Kart Wii - "Mushroom Gorge" by Joel Hands-Otte & mariolegofan

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Super Mario
Game: Mario Kart Wii
Console: Nintendo Wii
Title: Mushroom Gorge
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arrangers: Joel Hands-Otte & mariolegofan

[Sebastian]

Original:

[Bloop]

Make sure articulations and that kind of stuff don't clash with other things, like the mordent in the RH in bar 3 and the ottava bassa in bars 12-14. Also, the timing in beat 4 in bars 3-4 and 7-8 is 8th-16th-16th, not tuplet eights

[Sebastian]

Make sure articulations and that kind of stuff don't clash with other things, like the mordent in the RH in bar 3 and the ottava bassa in bars 12-14. Also, the timing in beat 4 in bars 3-4 and 7-8 is 8th-16th-16th, not tuplet eights

ok
I'll get on that.

[Sebastian]

Make sure articulations and that kind of stuff don't clash with other things, like the mordent in the RH in bar 3 and the ottava bassa in bars 12-14. Also, the timing in beat 4 in bars 3-4 and 7-8 is 8th-16th-16th, not tuplet eights

Fixed. Link in OP are fixed.

[Sebastian]

Fixed. Link in OP are fixed.

Anymore feedback?

[The Deku Trombonist]

Beat 4 in bar 8 to the first note of beat 3 in bar 9: the melody is a 3rd too low.

The bass line of bar 21 is missing the lower notes.

Perhaps get someone else thoughts on this too, but I'm not too sure about that intro/outro.

[Sebastian]

I'll get to this when I get on a computer

[Sebastian]

Beat 4 in bar 8 to the first note of beat 3 in bar 9: the melody is a 3rd too low.

The bass line of bar 21 is missing the lower notes.

Perhaps get someone else thoughts on this too, but I'm not too sure about that intro/outro.

Fixed

The bass line of bar 21 is missing the lower notes.

I'm not very good at this....but fixed. Better?

[Sebastian]

Perhaps get someone else thoughts on this too, but I'm not too sure about that intro/outro.

Does Olimar or Bespinben have anything to say about this?

[mikey]

I'm no bes or olimar but I think your interpretations of the clapping rhythms are a bit off D:

[Pit0010]

coming from a person that will most probably play this and upload it on youtube (bro i'm totally liking the arrangement)...I think the mordents (especially that one at bar 7) are nearly impossible to play...especially with the speed and the amount of notes to press down...
Besides that...bags playing it for you guys   just give me a year...to learn...xD

[Sebastian]

coming from a person that will most probably play this and upload it on youtube (bro i'm totally liking the arrangement)...I think the mordents (especially that one at bar 7) are nearly impossible to play...especially with the speed and the amount of notes to press down...
Besides that...bags playing it for you guys   just give me a year...to learn...xD

I'll watch it when you upload it!
I'll see about changing those.

[Bespinben]

Aww gee Noc, you always make me feel like I'm sort sort of special.

ALRIGHTY. Let's do this. Item number 1:
~In measure 10, it is clear that there are two distinct voices. Obviously, because they're rhythmically in unison, there's no need to write them as separate layers - UNTIL beat 3, that is. Whenever you have a two voices in harmonic unison, you should have them stemmed apart, to keep with the consistency of the two voice presence. Study any well-reputed church hymnal and you'll see this pattern engraved throughout.

~You may also want to consider writing a separate layer for when one of the voices cuts out early, like beat 3 of measure 14, again, to keep with the consistency of the two voice presence. This logic would also apply to measure 16.

Item 2:
~ There's an 8vb extension running all the way through the left hand of measure 12-14. And by through, I literally mean - THROUGH.
   --- (This problem is a subset of another problem really. There's hardly any space between each of the systems. Everything's really cramped together. Consider having only 4 systems on page 1, or minimize everything a few percentages.
~ The placement of the staccatos in measure 15 threw me off bad. I thought one of them was a dotted note value tbh. This can be fixed if you put all the articulations in layer 2 below the stems/beams and in layer 1, above. So do that. Pretty please.

Item 3:
~ The super funky awesome bass line in measure 21. In order to appreciate its funkiness, one needs to be able to see the beat it's being syncopated against. Therefore, the D natural eighth needs to be written as a 16th tied to a 16th, to clearly show beat 3.

Item 4:
~ I LOVE the way you and Fingerz interpreted all the percussion noises to a tonal setting. However, it could use a little work. Take measures 28-29. The hand-claps are on the off-beat, but the way your interpretation has it, it emphasizes the main beat. Maybe write accents? maybe change the melodic progression? (right now it kinda cascades downward, which isn't bad, but I think there's just so many different ways you could try to emphasize the correct accents.) Just think about it.

[Sebastian]

Thanks for the feedback! I'll get right on it!

Item 3:
~ The super funky awesome bass line in measure 21. In order to appreciate its funkiness, one needs to be able to see the beat it's being syncopated against. Therefore, the D natural eighth needs to be written as a 16th tied to a 16th, to clearly show beat 3.

I knew that 

Item 4:
~ I LOVE the way you and Fingerz interpreted all the percussion noises to a tonal setting. However, it could use a little work. Take measures 28-29. The hand-claps are on the off-beat, but the way your interpretation has it, it emphasizes the main beat. Maybe write accents? maybe change the melodic progression? (right now it kinda cascades downward, which isn't bad, but I think there's just so many different ways you could try to emphasize the correct accents.) Just think about it.

Just a question about this: What should I do here? Accents? Does it matter?