Ironic Wish Granting The Sequel

[braix]

Granted. Every chick in the world magnetically attracts to you. There are too many blocking your face and you die of suffocation.

I wish I was actually good at arranging

[Hero of Trains]

Granted, now you can't play your own arrangements.

I wish I had free time.

[Maelstrom]

Granted. You soon regret your decision after being coated in immature chickens 24/7

I wish I could come up with wishes instead of just snarky answers.

edit; DANG IT PAGE BREAK.

Granted, your time is worth nothing. Good luck finding a job when no one pays you anything.

Same wish.

[mikey]

to keep it ironic, not granted

I wish my wishes were fishes so that I could have a feast

[cashwarrior1]

Granted, you didn't wish for fish, you fish for fish. You now must work to eat.

I wish I had a Wii U.

[E. Gadd Industries]

Granted: A very powerful person walks into your house with a Wii console, and forcefully bends it into the shape of a "U", without breaking it (somehow).

I wish I was able to explain how that's possible.

[Nebbles]

Granted. You're able to, but no one believes you.

I wish I never got headaches.

[mikey]

granted.  You get terrible terrible toothaches instead

I wish I could go to minnesota

[cashwarrior1]

Granted, you went to minnesota. Not Minnesota, but minnesota.

I wish I wasn't so hot.

[mikey]

granted.  you are now ugly (strange wish)

I wish I could apologize for that

[BrainyLucario]

Granted, but you still receive a slap in the face from cashwarrior1.

I wish this site was renamed   (I honestly just want to see what someone comes up with for this one.)

[Hero of Trains]

Granted, now it's named Date Hot Girls in Your Area and you're ashamed to come here.

I wish I was done with exams.

[Dudeman]

Granted. You are, because you have chosen not to take any of them. They still happen, though, so you fail everything.

I wish I had a time machine. Just have it, not use it.

[E. Gadd Industries]

Granted, but the time machine is stolen from a prestigious laboratory. You are now a globally-wanted criminal. Good going.

I wish Ricco Harbor wouldn't give me such fits with its off-beat melodies.

[Dudeman]

Granted. It's on-beat now, but the melodic line is so terrible it makes your ears bleed every time you hear it.

I wish I could eat as much as I want and never get full.