Relationships

[Splatoon Inkling]

Thank you so much for your help! I'll do it! one question though, should I change anything or is that totally fine what I've got? I mean is this genuine enough? I mean it seems kind of short, but it might be good enough.

[Bobbythekid21]

Yeah, just remove the filler parts like "I just wanted to say" and "so" in the last sentence. Valentine's day cards are meant to be short and sweet unless it's a poem then it can be all different lengths.

Good luck and tell us how it goes!

[Splatoon Inkling]

Thank you! And yes, I will say. Just to let you know ahead of time, I'm actually homeschooled, and how I know her is through a home school group that I go to every monday called Classical Conversations, but anyway she won't get it till monday.

[Bobbythekid21]

That really neat! I homeschool as well and go to a homeschool group called "Homeschool Academy" (slow clap for creativity) every Thursday. I don't really like anybody in particular there but I guess I must be really attractive (I'm pretty sure I'm not) cause it seems like every month someone is telling me "so-and-so likes you" "so-and-so has a crush on you". I legit get sick of it. Before, I was worried I'd never find someone that likes me.
When I was a kid, I figured I'd just go with anybody (take what I can get, you know?). Now I have OPTIONS and I have to have much higher standards than "take whatever I can get".
I would say it has something to do with the fact that I am president at my homeschool group, as well as the head of the newspaper and the retired "only person who is allowed to play the piano at recess guy", but it's not just at my homeschool group, it's everywhere!
#highschoolsucks
#sorryfortherant

[Splatoon Inkling]

  kind of the same way with me, but I do want to make sure she does really like me first. Not to long ago she just kept talking about me she tried to call me twice, was texting me. I told her a joke then she told me a joke. But I'm a little confused, maybe it was just this joke or something, but we were having a conversation the other day on Google hangouts, (2 days ago) sent her a joke, and she said, "wow just wow, that's not even really funny." This was the joke Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence; then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what? Not responding for a little while seems to make her get more interested in me. So just to joke about myself afterwards I just said, ehh bad jokes are a specialty of mine.

[Bobbythekid21]

Wow just wow, our situations are so similar that's not even really funny. 

[Splatoon Inkling]

  yah, if she doesn't respond, and yes I've researched this DO NOT RESPOND AGAIN TO HER UNTIL SHE RESPONDS BACK! This will make her have to reach out to you, and make her want to talk to you, and yes this has worked for me. sometimes it may take several days, but it worked!

[Splatoon Inkling]

Well, Thanks for all your help Bobby!

[Bobbythekid21]

Learn to play crazy frog on the piano and do it non-stop.

[LeviR.star]

My two cents incoming ~~

Inkling, you should consider this not a matter of "getting her to like you more", but more of a matter of how comfortable she would be with the idea of pursuing a relationship with you. Her opinion of you is, while mostly modeled after how you may have acted/talked around her, not something you can control. At this point, I would suggest not changing a thing about you and just waiting for her response. If she decides she'd like to try going out with you, you're golden; just don't try to accommodate anything during the relationship if you feel you're not being "interesting" enough for her. If she turns you down, no matter how she does so, it will be your duty to respect that decision of hers and move on. Agree to remain her friend and don't make a huge deal about it. If that's how you react, it's more than likely she'll respect you for being mature and won't think much of the whole ordeal.

Remember, it's not the end of the world if she says no. You'll have plenty of other chances with the rest of the fish in the sea.

[Bobbythekid21]

More like words of wisdom incoming.
This was my first thought when you said that but I didn't know how to put it into words. Thanks, Levi.
So... *ahem* What he said!

[Splatoon Inkling]

My two cents incoming ~~

Inkling, you should consider this not a matter of "getting her to like you more", but more of a matter of how comfortable she would be with the idea of pursuing a relationship with you. Her opinion of you is, while mostly modeled after how you may have acted/talked around her, not something you can control. At this point, I would suggest not changing a thing about you and just waiting for her response. If she decides she'd like to try going out with you, you're golden; just don't try to accommodate anything during the relationship if you feel you're not being "interesting" enough for her. If she turns you down, no matter how she does so, it will be your duty to respect that decision of hers and move on. Agree to remain her friend and don't make a huge deal about it. If that's how you react, it's more than likely she'll respect you for being mature and won't think much of the whole ordeal.

Remember, it's not the end of the world if she says no. You'll have plenty of other chances with the rest of the fish in the sea.

I totally agree with that, and whatever happens it's not the end of the world, there are plenty of other girls out there in this world if this really ends up not working out.

[LeviR.star]

It's no problem, thank you for listening.

It almost makes me cringe reading my past posts in this topic. The last time it blew up here, I was confused and thought that respectfully rejecting a person and "friendzoning" were two different things -- I had something going on in my life at the time. Emma, who I had initially developed an infatuation for because I thought she was lonely, turned out not to be the girl I thought she was. Over time, I finally came to terms with the fact that she was extremely antisocial, that she didn't believe she had any real friends, and was constantly speaking her mind with no filter. By the time I eventually had no feelings left for her, I learned that she had been secretly telling nasty jokes about me, whether it was about my short-lived obsession for Kirby, or my naturally-hushed voice (she even went as far as making jokes about the size of my privates, even though we were never possibly that close.) The whole experience shaped my perception of rejection in an entirely negative way, until I eventually fell for Hallee for a bit (that's another story).

I'm not proud of my past, and I'm sorry for anyone who had to deal with me during that time, but I can only hope that you can stray away from the misconceptions that I made.

[Splatoon Inkling]

I did have a crush on this one girl before, but my problem was I was being needy, and insecure, and so it never really turned out to become a relationship, but I have learned a lot from it, and have made major changes in my life since then. TBH I think we all have made plenty of mistakes that we are very ashamed of in the past. You know I think she actually does kind of like me again since I have changed, but I don't really know that we ever would get together again (Although we were never actually gf and bf, but we were getting pretty close to that point.)

[Dudeman]

Just popping in here to say that it might be wise to alter names of people you know irl for their own privacy. I'm not suggesting anyone here's a stalker or would use this information against people, but it seems like a respectful thing to do when talking about people who don't know you're talking about them publicly in very personal ways.

Also, while I won't dictate anyone's choices, I will say that I advise against high school dating unless you're already extremely close to someone. An overwhelming majority of high school relationships crumble apart quickly because they're based mostly on feelings and urges rather than appreciation for a person's talents and personality. I do, however, highly advocate making good friends with people of the opposite sex, even if those friendships don't go anywhere past friendship. I'm 21 now and in an extremely healthy relationship, and it disappoints me a little how often I see people coupling up without really knowing each other.
TL;DR, be smart, make friends, don't make a long-term relationship the focus of your interactions with someone.