The Great NSM Novel

[MaestroUGC]

No, but it might be a good idea to have a doctor check out that cough.

[SlowPokemon]

CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Unleashing the Monster

    Slow was the first one out the door, and halted, looking around frantically for Mashi as the others caught up with him.

    "Make way!" shouted JaMaHa, pushing through the crowd. He stood in front of all of them and began barking orders. "Attention! Mashi has been accused of treason and must be apprehended by any means necessary! Is that clear?"

    "Yes, sergeant JaMaHa!" shouted his citizens in unison.

    "And one more thing!" he continued. "See to it that he's brought back alive." The mayor narrowed his eyes. "I've known Mashi for several years now, and I have to imagine that there's some sort of reasonable explanation for all this."

    "Sir, yes, sir!" affirmed the NSM citizens.

    "And if you are to find one Concerto No. 20 in D Minor, you are to bring him to safety immediately! Do I make myself clear?!"

    "YOU BET YOUR ASS!" screamed SFK. Everyone turned to stare at him, JaMaHa visibly fuming. "Um, I mean... SIR, YES, SIR!" he corrected.

    "GO!" JaMaHa cried. Everyone ran past him except Kefka--JaMaHa grabbed his arm and muttered "Stay behind. I've got to talk to you about something."
    The gang was running with haste after Mashi. The boy was running toward the center of town.

    "It looks like he's headed for the Old Cemetery!" shouted ETF. "Chase after him!"

    "What do you THINK we're doing, woman?" shrieked SFK, panting. "It's not like we're... going to... let that BASTARD... get away!"

    "I'm just trying to be helpful!" said ETF indignantly.

    "Save your arguments for later!" roared Dude. "This is srs bsns!"

    "Serce bizzins?" said Nebbles, confused.

    "SHUT UP, EVERYONE!" Roz shouted, her eyes flashing frighteningly. "I don't want to have to kill anyone today."

    Note to self: remain on Roz's good side, Slow thought. "There he is!" he said aloud, and there, indeed, he was.

    Mashi was standing in the very center of the Old Cemetery, next to the oldest and most decrepit tomb in the place. There was a slightly crazed look in his eye as he looked up, smiling wickedly, at the group now running toward him.

    "You're too late!" he shouted gleefully. "At last, I will reign supreme!"

    "Mashi, you can't do this!" howled Jub3r7. "What's happened to you?! Think of what we had together!"

    "None of that matters now!" cackled Mashi. "I will have ultimate, absolute power over this entire forums, and none of you have a chance!" He looked down at the tomb, and his wicked grin got even bigger. Suddenly he whipped an old, musty book out of his pocket. "Maybe you would have seen this coming if you had bothered to read past the hypnosis book on my receipt!" he laughed hysterically.

    "Uh... Slow," said Winter, growing pale as snow. "What exactly was on the receipt besides that book?"

    Slow gulped. He hadn't even thought to read past that. He thrust his shaking hand into his pocket and read aloud.

    "Black Magic: Awakening the Dead to Aid in Your Ultimate Destruction Plan in Five Easy Steps," he read.

    Jub3r7 fainted.

    Mashi began shouting, reading aloud from the ancient tome. "RISE! BY THE POWER OF ZETA, I COMMAND THEE TO RISE!" he screamed. "RISE AND CONQUER THIS PLACE SO THAT YOU MAY HAVE YOUR REVENGE! RISE, ZINTENDO!"

    "ZINTENDO?!" everyone shrieked. Jub, who had just come to after being tended to by Slow, passed out again into his arms.

    Suddenly, a shimmering figure floated through the lid of the tomb.

    "It is you," said Dude in awe.

    "But... your account has been gone for ages now," said ETF, confused.

    "The person lives on," said Zintendo delicately. "Even after discarding memories of... this place..." His eyes narrowed and he looked down on NSM with loathing. "...the person can continue to exist elsewhere. All Mashi here has done was to make a bridge between worlds..." The ghost suddenly smiled horrifically. "...Unfortunately for you. I plan to sacrifice myself to aid Mashi... as revenge for hoW I WAS TREATED!" the ghost suddenly screamed, becoming hysterical. Jub, already unconscious, passed into a light coma.

    The ghost exploded in a ball of light that temporarily blinded the entire company, save for Mashi who pulled out a pair of fashionable sunglasses. Slow blinked hard and regained sight just in time to see Zintendo's tomb... remodel. The coffin suddenly raised a hundred feet into the air, Mashi standing triumphantly atop it. Its sides were expanding--how was that possible?--and its shape contorting drastically. The sound of hundreds of gears plagued the ears of the citizens. They watched on in horror as Zintendo's tomb became a giant white mech, a huge machine whirring angrily. A giant drill was pointed straight at the citizens, and cannons lined both sides of the beast. Safe inside a small room with glass windows was Mashi, yet they still heard his manic voice shouting a command: "KILL THEM!"
Hoping to have this done by the end of this week.

[Dude]

A+++++++

I missed this so much.

[SlowPokemon]

<3

[Mashi]

omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg

A+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

[SlowPokemon]

CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Defeating the Monster

    The Zintendobot suddenly leapt forward, narrowly avoiding drilling straight through Dude.

    "When I wished to get drilled, this is not what I meant!" screamed Dude in terror.

    "We're literally SCREWED!" cried SFK, ducking to avoid one of the cannonballs that were now spewing forth steadily from the Zintendobot, exploding upon contact.

    "I'll stick with my explosive personality!" shrieked Nebbles, diving out of the way of an actual explosion.

    "Guys, get real! This is not a drill!" yelled Roz forcefully.

    "It sure looks like one!" shouted Winter hysterically.

    "THIS HAS BEEN A PUNTASTIC EXERCISE IN WRITING, BUT I REALLY THINK YOU SHOULD FOCUS ON GETTING US OUT OF THIS MESS!" roared Slow above the chaos.

    Right, sorry.

    The Zintendobot, intent on crushing all of the NSMers, lumbered forward, the sheer size guaranteeing escape was out of the question.

    "YOU AREN'T DOING A VERY GOOD JOB!" screamed Dude.

    I'M GETTING TO IT.

    "If we can't escape this thing, we have to defeat it!" shouted Roz over all the noise.

    "How do you even defeat something that big?!" yelled ETF.

    "You know what they say: the bigger the penis, the harder it gets!" shouted SFK. Everyone, including the Zintendobot, stopped activity and stared at him. Mashi took off his fashionable sunglasses and glared down at him. SFK blinked a couple times. "I'm just gonna... yeah." He ran for cover as the noise started up again, the Zintendobot now operating at full potential. Mashi put his fashionable sunglasses back on.

    "Maybe this'll do something!" said Winter, picking up a large stone and throwing it at the beast. The rock bounced off without leaving a scratch. The Zintendobot extended a mechanical arm and grabbed him suddenly. "THAT WAS MY PLAN, WHAT DO YOU GUYS HAVE?!" Winter shouted, terrified, as the Zintendobot waved him around.

    Slow took a deep breath. This was do or die. He gathered his composure, and ran straight at the beast, hoping to climb up the side and break through the glass. He could almost see himself confronting Mashi and taming the great beast, the entire city cheering him on, revering him as a hero as he--

    WHAM. The mechanical arm grabbed him, holding him tight next to Winter.

    "WHAT?!" shouted Dude in disbelief. "THIS IS YOUR STORY!"

    "HOW NARCISSISTIC DO YOU THINK I AM?!" screamed Slow.

    The Zintendobot finally cornered the citizens, backing them up against an intersection of two brick walls.

    "I guess this is goodbye," sobbed ETF.

    "Slow wouldn't actually kill us, right?" said Dude, looking alarmed for the first time since the story began.

    Suddenly there was a loud humming sound. Something was flying toward the Zintendobot.

    "It's a bird," said Nebbles in awe.

    "It's a plane!" said SFK.

    "IT'S A TWO-HEADED MAN ON A DONKEY!" shouted Winter, losing his head completely.

    "It's... a helicopter!" gasped Slow. "Seriously, how did someone think that was a bird or a plane for God's sake?"

    It's called making a reference, young Slow.

It was indeed a helicopter, and it had the NSM logo emblazoned on the side. It landed on top of the Zintendobot, denting the roof, before JaMaHa and Kefka exited and smashed through the glass windows, SWAT-team style. Kefka slammed some buttons on a control panel and the Zintendobot stopped moving with a screeching noise. The mechanical arm dropped Winter and Slow. They landed directly upon the recently-revived Jub3r7, who fainted once again from the impact.

    "MASHI!" roared JaMaHa. The entire company fell silent and Mashi actually looked somewhat frightened for the first time. "YOU ARE UNDER ARREST ON CHARGES OF TREASON, KIDNAPPING AND ATTEMPTED MURDER!"

    The company cheered.

    "What's next?" whispered Slow to Winter.

    "This isn't over quite yet, I fear," said Winter grimly. "Backups are due in two hours and we haven't found Concerto yet."

    "Well, we have our culprit, that's worth something," said ETF hopefully.

    "It's worth everything," said Roz firmly. "As annoying as some of you can be..." (she glanced disdainfully at SuperFireKirby here) "...you're like family and I rather like living here. We're going to make this bastard talk if I have to kill him in the process."

    Slow occasionally found himself awed into silence when Roz spoke, and this was one of those occasions.

    Kefka used a rope to scale down the beast. "Attention, everyone! JaMaHa has taken the suspect to the Town Hall. He wants all of you there to help sort out this mess."

    The group nodded as one and made their way to the center plaza.

[Kman96]

Well that escalated quickly.

[Mashi]

is this the part where i make love to everyone to absolve me for my crimes

[SlowPokemon]

no that's in the spinoff series i mentioned

[Dude]

is this the part where i make love to everyone to absolve me for my crimes

i'd forgive you for sure if you let us do that

...wait is it us topping you or you topping us?

[Roz~]

THIS STORY IS SO GOOD <3

[blueflower999]

I laughed way too hard

[K-NiGhT]

oh look a reason to come back randomly. sure why not.

ilu slow so glad you're gonna finish this!

[EFitTrainr]

I am dying
This is great

[MaestroUGC]

Still not in this.