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Bespinben's Arrangements! (020: "The Way Home" [帰り]~ PKMN Super Mystery Dungeon)

Started by Bespinben, July 02, 2011, 12:36:15 AM

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JDMEK5

Very well done! My biggest comment is on measure 4.

The run in the right hand seems kind of loud. I understand you may not be able to fix that, so if not, don't worry about it.
The melody notes need to stay loud and clear, but the run is a background thing. It should (usually) be much quieter than the rest.

The tremolo in the left hand seems overbearing.
I for one am not the hugest fan of left-hand tremolos, because they easily provide too much sound, and can drown out everything else.
That wasn't really the problem here though.
With that tremolo, I feel that the nature - the feel - of the piece was lost. I would recommend leaving the left hand there just like the other measures.
Another thing that kinda worries me is that those tremolos don't seem... playable. They're notated for 32nds, and that is blistering fast. I don't know if that's even physically possible.
For measure 4 at least, I would keep the chords like they were in the past measures. It keeps the feel of the whole piece; something you did extraordinarily well right from the beginning.

Beautiful use of the pedal in measures 7 and 8.

In measure 19, the melody has that awkward tie into triplets. I believe if you eliminated the tie, and made the triplets, G, F#, E (in descending order), that would be more normal and accurate.

I think the right hand overall could use some more articulation, such as staccatos and slurs. For example, a slur from the B to the F# on beat 3.5 in measure 1; and staccatos on the the last eighth note of measure 1, and the two eighths at the beginning of measure 2. Whatever is done must be repeated in the measures with the same theme.

Easily 90% of the time, it's the articulation that sets the difference between a good or bad performance; a computer playing the piece, or a real human.
The other thing that goes hand in hand with articulation is feeling. If you play with feeling, it's completely different than just playing the right notes. ... But now we're getting into musicianship. Nothing you need to worry about here.

This is otherwise a brilliant arrangement. I look forward to seeing more.
"Today's goal strongly involves not dying. Because nobody likes to wake up dead."

My Arrangements
Finale Version(s): Finale Notepad 2012, Finale 2012, Finale v26

Bespinben

#631
Woah ho ho! THAT is a comment! This is gonna be fun to answer~

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 28, 2012, 10:11:29 AMThe run in the right hand seems kind of loud. I understand you may not be able to fix that, so if not, don't worry about it.
The melody notes need to stay loud and clear, but the run is a background thing. It should (usually) be much quieter than the rest.
It is possible for me to create an invisible articulation marking, define it to lower note velocity, and apply it to each of the run notes, but since the run itself isn't in the original, I decided to just take it out.

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 28, 2012, 10:11:29 AMThe tremolo in the left hand seems overbearing.
I for one am not the hugest fan of left-hand tremolos, because they easily provide too much sound, and can drown out everything else.
That wasn't really the problem here though.
With that tremolo, I feel that the nature - the feel - of the piece was lost. I would recommend leaving the left hand there just like the other measures.
Another thing that kinda worries me is that those tremolos don't seem... playable. They're notated for 32nds, and that is blistering fast. I don't know if that's even physically possible.
For measure 4 at least, I would keep the chords like they were in the past measures. It keeps the feel of the whole piece; something you did extraordinarily well right from the beginning.
As recommended, I have now replaced the tremelos with the normal rhythm-support chords. As for their playability (since I did leave one left, at the end), when 3 bars are used in a tremelo, it is often a common way of stating the tremelo is unmeasured. That said, I'm not asking the performer to play 32nd notes in the LH in strict time, rather just to shake the thumb and pinky to produce a shaking sound.

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 28, 2012, 10:11:29 AMIn measure 19, the melody has that awkward tie into triplets. I believe if you eliminated the tie, and made the triplets, G, F#, E (in descending order), that would be more normal and accurate.
The melody actually is as I have previously notated, but the glockenspiel gives the impression that the melody is in the manner you stated. Nevetheless, I changed it to what you stated because that is how most people would perceive the melody in that passage, and the playing it in that manner is less mentally taxing.

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 28, 2012, 10:11:29 AMI think the right hand overall could use some more articulation, such as staccatos and slurs. For example, a slur from the B to the F# on beat 3.5 in measure 1; and staccatos on the the last eighth note of measure 1, and the two eighths at the beginning of measure 2. Whatever is done must be repeated in the measures with the same theme.
I have now applied more articulation as I saw fit.



Quote from: Jompa on September 28, 2012, 07:21:22 AMBespin, really great arrangement! Beautiful! If I weren't so tired right now, I'd probably write this in caps and with a lot of exclamation marks, so it's really good, despite my lame post. yawn

Also Bespin - do you think I can exploit your arrangement to make it for another type of ensemble, and perform it? I'll credit you, for what it's worth? :)

Thank you very much :)
You may use any of my sheets as you see fit. That's what they're for! (and credit the composers if you do that, not me)
Quote from: Nebbles on July 04, 2015, 12:05:12 PM
Someone beat Bespinben to making PMD music?! GASP!

MLF for Chatroom Mod next Tuesday

Cobraroll

Cool arrangement, albeit more difficult than the one we already have on site. I think it sounds a lot better, though.

Now on to Menu 2?
Emergence - a story exclusive to NSM

Yes, I'm still around from time to time. For quicker response, you can reach me by PM, or drop by Smogon to say hi. I go by "Codraroll" there, because of a bet.

JDMEK5

Quote from: Bespinben on September 28, 2012, 01:43:45 PMAs for their playability (since I did leave one left, at the end), when 3 bars are used in a tremelo, it is often a common way of stating the tremelo is unmeasured. That said, I'm not asking the performer to play 32nd notes in the LH in strict time, rather just to shake the thumb and pinky to produce a shaking sound.
I actually didn't know that.
"Today's goal strongly involves not dying. Because nobody likes to wake up dead."

My Arrangements
Finale Version(s): Finale Notepad 2012, Finale 2012, Finale v26

Bespinben

Quote from: Cobraroll on September 28, 2012, 02:24:46 PMalbeit more difficult than the one we already have on site.
Now on to Menu 2?
I'm actually inclined to disagree. Due to the poor formatting, incorrect key signature, excessive ledger lines, and incorrect (and occasionally illegible) rhythms, I think the one on the site is actually just as or more difficult to play.

I won't be making a Menu 2 arrangement for two reasons: 1.) I'm making SSBM arrangements for Fixing the Sheets project, so these are all replacements, and; 2.) I honestly don't like the Menu 2 music :P
Quote from: Nebbles on July 04, 2015, 12:05:12 PM
Someone beat Bespinben to making PMD music?! GASP!

MLF for Chatroom Mod next Tuesday

JDMEK5

Quote from: Bespinben on September 28, 2012, 03:04:18 PMI honestly don't like the Menu 2 music :P
??? .... That's a crime.

But very well; I'll do it if I get the time.
"Today's goal strongly involves not dying. Because nobody likes to wake up dead."

My Arrangements
Finale Version(s): Finale Notepad 2012, Finale 2012, Finale v26

Jompa

Birdo for Smash

Bespinben

BESPINBEN vs. FINGERZ!!! (FOURTH entry)

I know Jompa already made a replacement of SSBM Fountain of Dreams for Fixing the Sheets project (a good one at that), but I didn't feel like it emulated the original quite right. It was really... chordy, too, unnecessarily so. As such, I felt inclined to make my own transcription. Enjoy~

(And Jompa, if you're reading this, please don't take offense. Your arrangement was really was good, it's just I really want the SSBM replacements to be as best as they can be.)

[GCN] Super Smash Bros. Melee:

"Fountain of Dreams":
[MUS] [MIDI] [PDF]


Quote from: Jompa on September 29, 2012, 12:59:27 AMI tried but I gave up.
At what? The arrangement? I'm pretty sure it's playable - I modeled many of the chordal voicings after MMLeung's cover.
Quote from: Nebbles on July 04, 2015, 12:05:12 PM
Someone beat Bespinben to making PMD music?! GASP!

MLF for Chatroom Mod next Tuesday

JDMEK5

Once again, amazing! This time I only have a few notes:

You kept the original feel quite well throughout the piece; except the bass section beginning at measure 24.. But there's only so much you can do, so that's fine.

Beginning at measure 8, the C5 chord in the right hand should be written with a heavy accent, and a staccato in my opinion.
The dynamic marking for that first beat should be a sforzando. (sfz)
Maybe make the left hand hit the C below the bass clef for a nice booming octave.

Measures 4-7: Make sure those chords in the right hand stay nice and soft. They are only background, and could be quieter. (Small little thing)

Beautiful job with the brass section in measures 40-55! It's one of my favorite sections of this entire song, and you captured it perfectly.

Measure 54 is pretty hardcore. I would think about making that a bit easier, so you don't have to be a piano whiz to play it.

Nice cadence at the end. Perfect always beats plagal if you ask me.. (Just preference)

That's it today. Keep 'em coming!
"Today's goal strongly involves not dying. Because nobody likes to wake up dead."

My Arrangements
Finale Version(s): Finale Notepad 2012, Finale 2012, Finale v26

Bespinben

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 30, 2012, 12:05:22 PMYou kept the original feel quite well throughout the piece; except the bass section beginning at measure 24.. But there's only so much you can do, so that's fine.
Thanks for understanding. The problem there was that there were 3 different parts there, each on very different ends of the piano. It was either the bass and flute trills, or the bass and the staccato strings.

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 30, 2012, 12:05:22 PMBeginning at measure 8, the C5 chord in the right hand should be written with a heavy accent, and a staccato in my opinion.
The dynamic marking for that first beat should be a sforzando. (sfz)
Maybe make the left hand hit the C below the bass clef for a nice booming octave.
Applied. However, sforzando plus an accent would be redundant, plus I could only write in an accent at most due to spacing issues.

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 30, 2012, 12:05:22 PMMeasures 4-7: Make sure those chords in the right hand stay nice and soft. They are only background, and could be quieter. (Small little thing)
I have now some additional articulation there.

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 30, 2012, 12:05:22 PMMeasure 54 is pretty hardcore. I would think about making that a bit easier, so you don't have to be a piano whiz to play it.
I disagree. All one needs is to do is depress the psuedo-sostenuto pedal immediately before the measure and then arpeggiate the left hand from the low octave G into the treble 2nd layer.

Quote from: JDMEK5 on September 30, 2012, 12:05:22 PMNice cadence at the end. Perfect always beats plagal if you ask me.. (Just preference)
Haha, thanks. I was thinking of restating the somber intro for the ending like the "Smashing... Live!" version does, but I just decided not to. Makes it simpler, I guess.
Quote from: Nebbles on July 04, 2015, 12:05:12 PM
Someone beat Bespinben to making PMD music?! GASP!

MLF for Chatroom Mod next Tuesday

JDMEK5

Quote from: Bespinben on September 30, 2012, 05:07:51 PMI disagree. All one needs is to do is depress the psuedo-sostenuto pedal immediately before the measure and then arpeggiate the left hand from the low octave G into the treble 2nd layer.
Right. That's what I thought knew you meant when I saw the PDF. But I'll leave it up to you if you think most people can do that.
"Today's goal strongly involves not dying. Because nobody likes to wake up dead."

My Arrangements
Finale Version(s): Finale Notepad 2012, Finale 2012, Finale v26

Bespinben

BESPINBEN vs. FINGERZ!!! (FIFTH entry)

This is the map I probably fought on most, so I thought it should be the next one for which I would make a replacement, since it's got an awesome theme and all. The harmonies around measure 29+ were a pain to transcribe.

(This song is a modulating mess. If you got input on anything concerning accidentals, do share. I think I did an OK-ish job though.)
(In measure 36, by "faux sost.", I am referring to the knock-off sostenuto found in virtually all upright pianos and in some low-end grand pianos, the function of which lifts the dampers off the bass tones. This is essential for the repeated note section.)

[GCN] Super Smash Bros. Melee:

"Final Destination":
[MUS] [MIDI] [PDF]
Quote from: Nebbles on July 04, 2015, 12:05:12 PM
Someone beat Bespinben to making PMD music?! GASP!

MLF for Chatroom Mod next Tuesday

Bespinben

BESPINBEN vs. FINGERZ!!! (SIXTH entry)

Such a soothing song. Wouldn't expect that from your typical fighting game, but then again, Super Smash ain't your typical fighting game. I really like that it's a remake of the same song that plays in the Save Room in Kirby Super Star (and it's remake Ultra) during The Great Cave Offensive, as if the composers were trying to make a statement of how both games involved references to other Nintendo franchises (collecting various items from other franchises in Kirby Super Star, compared to battling various Nintendo characters in Melee).

Oh, and I need help with this track's nomenclature. I did hours of research, and there are two titles I see recurring: "All-Star Rest Area" and "All-Star Intro". SSBM has no official OST release, so there was no way to confirm which was the correct title.
If I could ask a favor, would someone please open up the sound test feature in Melee and tell me what it calls this track? I'd do it myself, but my half-sister last had the disc, and she has no clue where it is :/

[GCN] Super Smash Bros. Melee:

"All-Star Rest Area":
[MUS] [MIDI] [PDF]
Quote from: Nebbles on July 04, 2015, 12:05:12 PM
Someone beat Bespinben to making PMD music?! GASP!

MLF for Chatroom Mod next Tuesday

spitllama

"All-Star Intro" is what my Sound Test shows. It's the only song related to All-Star mode. It's the same tune. However, it's also MUCH faster than your arrangement. It's at about 82/83 on the quarter note.
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JDMEK5

I won't be able to respond to this one till sunday at least.

Too bad I missed the other one too...

I'll make up for it when I can.
"Today's goal strongly involves not dying. Because nobody likes to wake up dead."

My Arrangements
Finale Version(s): Finale Notepad 2012, Finale 2012, Finale v26