Jokes

[Raymondbl]

Why is Santa so jolly?
...He knows where all the naughty girls live

Why is Santa so jolly?

...He knows where all the naughty girls live.

You posted the exact same thing a year ago, like five posts above.

[Greg]

An economist, logician, and mathematician are sitting in a train which has just entered Scotland. The three see a brown cow standing outside the window of the train.
The economist says, "Hey, look, the cows in Scotland are brown."
The logician says, "No, actually, there are cows in Scotland, at least one of which is brown."
The mathematician says, "You're both wrong. There's at least one cow in Scotland, at least one side of which is brown."

I lol'd. xD

[Jamaha]

What do a church service in Helsinki and
Mortal Kombat have in common?

- Finnish Hymn.

[Raymondbl]

What do a church service in Helsinki and
Mortal Kombat have in common?

- Finnish Hymn.

lol!

[Olimar12345]

How many people with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb?

...

LETS GO RIDE BIKES‼

[blueflower999]

How do you make a trombone sound like a French horn?

Put your hand in the bell and miss a lot of notes.

[the_last_sheikah]

[Raymondbl]

  yeah that's why grammar is important, even if it's obvious what someone meant either way.  Some people might not get it. 

[Nebbles]

oh my god that's hilarious

[Raymondbl]

I personally don't really think it's funny because it's happened to me before.

[JDMEK5]

I have the body of an 18 year-old...

I keep it in the fridge.

Two people walk out of a bar. One person says to the other, "Hey, is that the sun or the moon?".
The other person says, "I don't know, I don't live around here."

At my house we use paper plates and every night my wife erases the dishes.

A man from the symphony fell through his harp. He's currently in the hospital in rooms 9, 10, 11, and 12.

[Jub3r7]

A guy was trying to console a friend who had just found his wife
in bed with another man.
"Get over it, buddy," he said. "It's not the end of the world."
"It's all right for you to say," answered his friend. "But what
if you came home one night and caught another man in bed with
your wife?"
The guy ponders for a moment, then says, "I'd break his cane
and kick his seeing-eye dog in the butt."

[JDMEK5]

How are an elephant and a plum the same?

           - They're both purple, except for the elephant.

And a couple cruel musician jokes:

What's the difference between a tuba player and a trampoline?

            - You take your shoes off to jump on the trampoline.
What's the difference between a dead violinist in the middle of the road and a dead frog in the middle of the road?

            - The skid marks in front of the frog.
How do you get a trumpet player off your doorstep?

            - Pay him for the pizza.
If you dropped a trombone and a saxophone off a 12-story building, which would hit the ground first?

            - Who cares?

[Nebbles]

I have the body of an 18 year-old...

I keep it in the fridge.

Two people walk out of a bar. One person says to the other, "Hey, is that the sun or the moon?".
The other person says, "I don't know, I don't live around here."

At my house we use paper plates and every night my wife erases the dishes.

A man from the symphony fell through his harp. He's currently in the hospital in rooms 9, 10, 11, and 12.

dfsklfhsdklsd the last one

[JDMEK5]

dfsklfhsdklsd the last one

*extremely confuzzled*  Could you elaborate?
(I couldn't find dfsklfhsdklsd in the dictionary  )