Jokes

[Altissimo]

singer jokes are the best omg

[Pianist Da Sootopolis]

Unlike the singers themselves.

[Altissimo]

[SlowPokemon]

Lol all of those are accurate except the one about pianists speaking to other pianists, unless they're at a pre-college or non-advanced level (in my experience, anyway).

[Altissimo]

one of my rep was literally because we studied it in music history lol

[E. Gadd Industries]

Since I'm too lazy to figure out if this joke has been told yet or not, I apologize if it is already on here:

A man was walking through a graveyard late at night. Suddenly, he heard Beethoven's 9th, being played in reverse. Once it had finished, there was a few minutes of silence. Then, Beethoven's 8th. Then 7th. Etc. Etc. Etc. The man, obviously scared past his wits, calls his church's pastor, and asks what's going on. The preacher replies: "Oh, that's just Beethoven decomposing!"

[Dudeman]

I've heard a variation on that where some researchers dig up Beethoven's coffin to see if anything secret was buried with him, only to find him furiously erasing manuscript upon manuscript of his own music. When asked what he was doing, he simply replied, "I'm decomposing."

[E. Gadd Industries]

Imo, that version is better than what I've heard.

[Zunawe]

The version I know is that a tour of a famous historical music hall comes across a dead man at a piano. The tourists are asked to be quiet because the maestro was decomposing.

[ShadowChords]

Is it just me, or is it easy to turn dead baby jokes into viola jokes?

[braix]

It's just you.

[Dude]

Did you hear the joke about a mute guy?

Me neither.

[Jub3r7]

Did you hear the joke about a mute guy?

Me neither.

no but i did read it on the internet (from a really cool dude)

You guys will love this joke.

When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Beethoven's Ninth Sympahony, being played backwards." He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling." So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the Sixth... the Fifth..." Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Beethoven decomposing."

[ShadowChords]

It's just you.

Really? Ok. It just seems so easy. For example:

Q: How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall?
A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

Q: How many violas does it take to paint a wall?
A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

[Dudeman]

Sarcasm. Learn to interpret it.