The Will to Go On--Full Story+Afterthoughts

[SlowPokemon]

Yeah, I think you posted that somewhere else.

winterkid09's review of "The Will to Go On"

Prologue

To start off, I couldn't help but notice how many times the letter "o" was used in this chapter.

^^ oh don't mind him. XD

I think maybe the word leapt needs to be leaped? "leapt" and "lept" both come up as mis-spelled.

This chapter was one of the best hooking chapters I've seen before, most books require me to read at least 3 chapters before I'm actually enticed to read it. The emotion in this chapter was accurate too, It would be hard to imagine the emotion of such an event.

The only thing I'd say was that adding descriptions of the mother, maybe a name or brief memories would be good at the point where Will and his father are huddled up. The "generic mother" visual I get should be refined.

Most importantly, why is she in the hospital? if will is 6, you's assume the parents are not far from the age of 30, what cause a person to die so early!

From reading ahead the only thing noting on that is that she "became sick"

I definitely wanted to hear more about that, despite the story's drastic turn soon after, making it not matter!

*note*-----------------------------------^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

___________________________________________________________________

Well the review started out really thin then I started to figure it out. Let's just say it would be sad if every critic wrote like I did XD

Thank you! I'll enjoy the rest!

[SlowPokemon]

Also, I've been meaning to mention this... you people are going to kill me for this...

I'm pulling a J.K. Rowling and announcing that I have a sneaking suspicion that Will is...gay.

PHEW. Thank god I got that off my chest.

[DrP]

winterkid09's review of "The Will to Go On"

Well the review started out really thin then I started to figure it out. Let's just say it would be sad if every critic wrote like I did XD

Nope! I analyzed the story as a whole... from a LITERARY perspective... sentence structure, use of diction, syntax, and all the other fun stuff... and then I talked about the storyline.

Slow: You're welcome to post my review if you're so inclined...

[Jub3r7]

Don't worry, he's not gay. Although there's a chance he might be asexual, as in not loving either genders.

>_< Why do I say these things...

[SlowPokemon]

Karen thinks he's gay, but I don't really:

“Yes, but what if Will likes you?” asked Lucian hopefully.

   â€œI don’t think he does,” said Karen, frowning. “In fact, I have a sneaking suspicion that Will…”

   â€œNo, no, no!” said Lucian, looking angry...

Also, I know what asexual means. I am not exactly an ignoramus.

[Jub3r7]

I know. I could have been referring to the fact that I had to remind myself what it meant.






OHNOES I'm an ignoramus.

[SlowPokemon]

Oh yeah, meant to mention this eventually, but the original song they were all dancing to was Planet of the Blue Grass from SMG2. :3

I know the song they were waltzing to as well... but that may stay secret.

[DrP]

I know the song they were waltzing to as well... but that may stay secret.

Something Joe Hisaishi (or however you spell his last name)?

[SlowPokemon]

Nah, good guess though. Howl's Moving Castle would be cool to waltz to.

I was thinking something a little more minor (Howl's Moving Castle is technically in D minor even though it ends on a major chord), maybe like the Godfather Waltz...

[DrP]

It's good. I'd dance to it... but it definitely isn't in my top 10 (or top 100 for that matter). I love the Viennese Waltz, so I have to find stuff suited for it. Also, waltzes, to me, have to have a certain grandeur that just hits the spot!

Try this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCXSuY7ZFgM. I do have a version without words and it sounds more "romantique"

[Jub3r7]

Any music is fine, as long as we don't have to switch partners any more.

[SlowPokemon]

I just got an awesome idea . Thanks Jub.

[Jub3r7]

As in I just got paired with Cynthia no need to switch partners.

[SlowPokemon]

Yeah I got that-- I may write a "minisode" or two featuring characters. When you said that I wondered to myself "does Cynthia still keep in touch? Or is she with Norman?" I got an image in my head of Cynthia calling you in the real world. xD

Sometimes stories stem from a little idea like that

[Jub3r7]

Also, October is our reunion... I only fight the elite four in October. XD

I am going to write something!
I'm not mentally prepared to write "Run To" because that's some serious stuff at the beginning...
But thank you ahead of time for getting me to write again.

Edit: Actually, I'm going to start "Run To" differently than I thought I would, so that way the serious stuff can be explained later...
And the story can start in media res. Hehe, Latin.