Omegle Convos!

[GaryOak]

Well, I haven't had much funny omegle conversations but this brought some smile to me.

Stranger: sup
You: awesomesauce
Stranger: youre a faggot
Stranger: asl
You:
You: f17
Stranger: suck my wang
You: it's too small
Stranger: fuck u
Stranger: im 20 and have an erection
Stranger: and a gang
You: and still it's too small lol
Stranger: you want me to kill u
Stranger: i know where u live
You: you can't kill me with that small penis
Stranger: are u like 8
You: you have 8cm
Stranger: i meant age cocksucker
Stranger: just jocking
You: lol
Stranger: i meant joking
Stranger: asl
You: u already asked that:(
Stranger: wut location
You: california
Stranger: wut city
Stranger: wanna go out
You: um...sacramento?
You: maybe
Stranger: um
Stranger: ?
Stranger: wow liar
Stranger: wut ur name
Stranger: hello
Stranger: k bye
Stranger: im sorry
You: wat
You: jane
Stranger: og loc
You: what the hell does that mean
Stranger: original gangster
Stranger: hurry up ova there
You: ok i will!
Stranger: so do u live by ur self
You: yep
Stranger: im just kidding
You: i know yuo are
You: u perv
Stranger: i dont even know u so umm
Stranger: i dont care where u live
You: u don't, awww:(
Stranger: or if u live by ur self because i am only 20 and have a girl friend
Stranger: so i dont want to go out with u
You: don't pretend
Stranger: i live kinda far
Stranger: im not
Stranger: pretending
You: ok, well I'm not disappointed
You: since I'm m20
You: too
Stranger: cool
Stranger: gay ass
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Everytime some asl me, I answer "f17" or "what do you want me to be;)". Then they don't disconnect immediately lol.

[ETFROXX]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: asl
You: 16f
Stranger: wanna suck my dick?
You: nthx mayb l8r
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[SlowPokemon]

lol ETF

Next time, I'm going to say "I represent Omegle" just because the message tells me not to.

[ETFROXX]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: I LOVE YOU.
You: I knew it.
Stranger: Marry me?
You: Would you agree to a prenup?
Stranger: ....hmmmmmmmm yes :O
You: THEN YES.
Stranger: WOO!
You: Where shall we wed?
Stranger: .....Vegas?
You: Can Elvis marry us? I admire him so.
Stranger: YES!
Stranger: Can a hobo be our witness?
You: YES!
Stranger: WOOT!
You: WHAT ABOUT THE HONEYMOON?
Stranger: Hmmm....CANADA? XD
You: I like how you think.
You: We'll have all that sexy maple syrup.
Stranger: thats why we are getting married
You: I promise to love you forever!
Stranger: ME TOO!
You: WAIT! DO WE PLAN TO REPRODUCE?
Stranger: Depends on how the honeymoon goes
You: I'm thinking it'd go quite well.
You: WHEN WILL WE WED?
You: TODAY?
You: TOMORROW?
Stranger: RIGHT.NOW.
You: Oh god.
You: Pressure.
You: Dear, I think we're moving too fast.
You: =(
Stranger: BUT BUT BUT....
Stranger: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH
You: I JUST CAN'T TAKE THIS PRESSURE!
Stranger: D:
You: I WANT THINGS IN LIFE BEFORE I SETTLE DOWN!
You: I NEED TIME!
You: ;~;
Stranger: HOW MUCH TIME?!
You: Give me 5 minutes.
You have disconnected.

[SlowPokemon]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: Hey
You: I represent Omegle.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: I look better in purple.
You: I am sure you do...
You: better than what?
Stranger: mhm.
Stranger: purple.
You: You look better in purple than in purple?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: Some people just can't handle awesomeness
Stranger: so true
You: Awesome people like me have it hard.
Stranger: are you awesome?
You: totally
You:
Stranger: ah i see
Stranger: must be tough how do you cope
You: It's not easy, but cookies help.
You: Chocolate chip.
You: >
Stranger: yeah gotta have cookies
Stranger: they have them on the dark side you no
You: indeed
You: that's why I'm here
Stranger: bet people dont appreciate how awesome you are
You: totally
You: theyre just jealous of my mad skillz
Stranger: whatt mad skillz
You: stuff like being the awesomest human in existence ever
Stranger: right yeah you got minions
You: totally
You: theyre little chocolate chip cookies
You: and they follow me everywhere
You: AND OBEY ME
Stranger: aww brill they double as delicious snacks too so smart
You: yep, i had to pay extra for that but it's so worth it
Stranger: so worth it
You: they reproduce really fast, so i don't have to worry about eating them
You: but i only eat the ones that don't appreciate my awesomeness
Stranger: aw good were did you get them i might have to invest, of course i could never be as awesome as you but i can work towards it
You: THE DARK SIDE
You have disconnected.

[universe-X]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: I LOVE YOU.
You: I knew it.
Stranger: Marry me?
You: Would you agree to a prenup?
Stranger: ....hmmmmmmmm yes :O
You: THEN YES.
Stranger: WOO!
You: Where shall we wed?
Stranger: .....Vegas?
You: Can Elvis marry us? I admire him so.
Stranger: YES!
Stranger: Can a hobo be our witness?
You: YES!
Stranger: WOOT!
You: WHAT ABOUT THE HONEYMOON?
Stranger: Hmmm....CANADA? XD
You: I like how you think.
You: We'll have all that sexy maple syrup.
Stranger: thats why we are getting married
You: I promise to love you forever!
Stranger: ME TOO!
You: WAIT! DO WE PLAN TO REPRODUCE?
Stranger: Depends on how the honeymoon goes
You: I'm thinking it'd go quite well.
You: WHEN WILL WE WED?
You: TODAY?
You: TOMORROW?
Stranger: RIGHT.NOW.
You: Oh god.
You: Pressure.
You: Dear, I think we're moving too fast.
You: =(
Stranger: BUT BUT BUT....
Stranger: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH
You: I JUST CAN'T TAKE THIS PRESSURE!
Stranger: D:
You: I WANT THINGS IN LIFE BEFORE I SETTLE DOWN!
You: I NEED TIME!
You: ;~;
Stranger: HOW MUCH TIME?!
You: Give me 5 minutes.
You have disconnected.

Too many people are hitting on my wife.

;~;

[ETFROXX]

YEAH! EVEN ONES THAT HAVEN'T SEEN ME!

[SlowPokemon]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: hey
Stranger: hey
Stranger: wadup
You: would you care if i interviewed you
Stranger: nope go ahead
You: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR
Stranger: red and black especially wen its blood red
You: How was your St. Patrick's Day?
Stranger: i didnt kinda have one- im english and turkish but we only like xmas
You: Do you have AIDs?
Stranger: no
You: Did you kill a hooker in Atlantic City on the night of the 24th?
Stranger: no i didnt-interestin questions u have
You: And how do you feel about that?
Stranger: about not killin someone?
Stranger: great awsome
You: What's the meaning of life?
Stranger: for me its knowing how to live it or my other answer is it doesnt have one
You: Is this a question? Explain.
Stranger: is what a question
You: What's the answer to this question?
Stranger: this question has no answer cuz im not sure what the question is
You: "Soo, how do you feel about the upcoming and probably final season of the Jersey shore?" *sips drink*
Stranger: pass
You: Do I seem like the kind of interviewer who would watch Jersey Shore?
Stranger: you seem like i cool interviewer who i can expect anything from
You: When is the reprise?
Stranger: pass
You: Where will the reprise take place?
Stranger: pass
You: Is it true that you are plotting against the government because it won't let you marry a houseplant?
Stranger: no its not true but that we would be so funny if it waas
You: Are you willing to scratch my back from 8 PM to 6 PM on Wednesdays?
Stranger: sure
You: Does that question make sense?
Stranger: no
You: Are you questioning me?
Stranger: no
You: Everything I say is a lie. Am I telling the truth?
Stranger: it depends on which part you are talking about
You: What is the capital of East Korea?
Stranger: i dont care
You: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?
Stranger: yes someone not hearing something doesnt make it stop making the sound
You: Will you ever decide to publish your life memoirs, and if so, can I write them?
Stranger: maybe, ill think about it
You: Aren't you getting tired of these questions?
Stranger: no
You: If you are a sign maker, and you go on strike, what's written on your sign?
Stranger: im not sure
You: Are you dead yet?
Stranger: not yet but i feel like im gonna be one day
You: Thank you for answering all these questions. You are the first person I have found who will go through all of them. xD Let me just copy this chat... then you're free to go if u want

[Winter]

That person is.... not intellectual.

but that's a good use of that thread

[SlowPokemon]

actually we're still chatting lol

[Winter]

I mean we put the questions to use.

[SlowPokemon]

I did it earlier with this girl, and when she got to the question about the Atlantic City hooker, she was like "no" and then a second later "are you from the FBI or something?"

btw, while on Omegle, type "FBI" in one of your posts.

[Winter]

Yea I've done that XD

[SlowPokemon]

that site is really pretty addicting

[Jub3r7]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: Hello
You: WHAT DO YOU WANT
You: Stranger
You: o god what's happening to me
You: Oh nevermind.
You: It was just my pet bird
Stranger: o.o
Stranger: Ooh, they can be a real pain.
You: You have no idea
You: Stupid pidgeons >_<
Stranger: Your pet bird is a pigeon?
Stranger: Why not get a canry?
You: I SAID SHUT THE stupid pidgeon
Stranger: *canary
You: No, I don't own the pidgeons
You: They just fly in here
You: and STEAL MY FRIGGIN SANDWHIOCHES
Stranger: But you said pet?
You: Well, yeah, that was my owl
You: It was trying to eat the pidgeons
Stranger: Hedwig?
Stranger: Ooh, why not let it?
You: NO YOU SHALL NOT DISGRACE MY OWL WITH THAT HORRID NAME
You: It's name is Ashley
Stranger: I think it's cute.
Stranger: Ashley..?
Stranger: Who names an owl Ashley?
Stranger: I like your use of the word horrid though.
You: ...You know, I have no idea.
Stranger: You didn't name her?
Stranger: Or him..
You: It could be, but I don't quite remember...
You: IT was a long night
Stranger: Hmm, a name change can always be had.
You: I tried, the government didn't let me marry the houseplant...
You: OH WAIT sorry you meant my owl
Stranger: Ooh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Stranger: And yes, the owl was my question, though I'm much more interested in the houseplant.
Stranger: Are you two in love?
Stranger: Or were you just planning on marrying it for it's money?
You: No, it was a petunia. I didn't really name it so...
You: I dumped it and got an owl
Stranger: Now are you planning on owl marriage?
You: HECK NO
You: DO YOU KNOW HOW PAINFUL THOSE BEAKS ARE
You: gawd sorry capslock
Stranger: Well...No I don't.
You: You don't really want to know.
Stranger: But boats are floated by all different sorts of things.
Stranger: Some people get off by dead bodies, others like to be strangled. You never know...
You: I was suggested by someone in particular to tell you that water works the best.
Stranger: But of course. Apple juice works too, though.
You: I was also told to tell you that some people get off of dead bodies... O_O WHAT SHE SAID THAT
You: I actually had no idea what she said until I typed it
Stranger: They also get on..
You: I'm kinda freaked out now...
Stranger: Ahh.
You: Yeah, owls sure can be weird.
Stranger: It wasn't bad though. No worse than your plant fetish.
You: WHO SAID IT WAS A FETISH.
You: Oh nevermind
You: I forgot what a fetish was
Stranger: Oh, sorry I infered.
You: Um maybe
Stranger: Ohh.
You: I have to google define fetish first
Stranger: Is it?
Stranger: Google is grand, isn't it??
You: yes
You: oh god
Stranger: Ahh, two question marks for the price of one. Awesome.
You: My owl started attacking me when it saw the definition
You: It thinks I'm cheating on her...
Stranger: Ooh, it knows!
You: Unfortunately.
Stranger: Run, little person, run!
You: Gotta waatch out for them owls...
You: WAIT HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT MY HEIGHT COMPLEX
Stranger: Are you vertically challenged?
You: STOP STALKING ME.
You have disconnected.