[MUL] Paranormasight: The Seven Mysteries of Honjo - "I'll Be Close By" by Metamyrrh

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Submission Information:
Series: Other
Game: Paranormasight: The Seven Mysteries of Honjo
Console: Multiplatform
Title: I'll Be Close By
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Metamyrrh

[Metamyrrh]

Thank you to Atcero for kindly converting my files to Finale!

Fyi, I meant to put parentheses on the LH notes that overlap with the RH in m8 and m9, but looks like they disappeared in the conversion to Finale. I'll add them back after the first round of feedback!

[Kricketune54]

Thank you Atcero as well! Things are a biiiiit stretched for the 1st system of page 2 but otherwise things seem to have converted pretty well. Just starting with a bit of a skim of first half or so but wanted to leave some feedback:

• m1 RH 4.5 hearing an F# 8th note (same octave as 3.5)
• m12 RH 1.5-3.0 I understand the reasoning for putting these up an octave, I'd suggest just staying at the original octave though. I don't think restriking the F# on 3.5 is a big enough reason to move this part all the way up.
• m13 RH not hearing a second layer, Gn on 1.0 is same length as the Bn above it, and there is a Dn at bottom of this grouping. On 2.5, the Bn and Dn are restruck (underneath the Bn). On 3.0 I hear a En below current notes. On 4.0, I hear Dn below the Bn, and an En below the A# on 4.5
• m14 RH Dn underneath the Bn
• m21 4.5 RH not hearing this separate Dn, sounds like Fn is held for whole note length.

[Metamyrrh]

Thank you very much for taking a look!

Thank you Atcero as well! Things are a biiiiit stretched for the 1st system of page 2 but otherwise things seem to have converted pretty well.

I see what you mean, and measures 27 and 31 look too wide too. Sorry, I do not think I can do anything about this from Musescore.

• m13 RH not hearing a second layer, Gn on 1.0 is same length as the Bn above it, and there is a Dn at bottom of this grouping. On 2.5, the Bn and Dn are restruck (underneath the Bn). On 3.0 I hear a En below current notes. On 4.0, I hear Dn below the Bn, and an En below the A# on 4.5

Added, except I do not hear the En in beat 4.5.

Fixed everything else!

Here are the updated musicxml and mscz files: https://www.mediafire.com/file/xuwhx32cw6zph3b/I'll+be+close+by+v2.zip/file

[Kricketune54]

Thank you very much for taking a look!
I see what you mean, and measures 27 and 31 look too wide too. Sorry, I do not think I can do anything about this from Musescore.

We (updaters) will just have to update that later when doing our file tweaking of the import to Finale

Added, except I do not hear the En in beat 4.5.

I'm still hearing this - it's the strings part in the original

Sorry for the wait, but back with a bit of a deeper look.

• m11 and 12 LH not hearing a different note on 4.0, sounds like 3.5 is a quarter note length F#
• m15-17 LH you could imitate the string tremolos here from the original, maybe between Gn-C# and An-Dn on m15-16, and An-Dn and Bn-En for m17?
• m21 LH 1.0 add the An under the Fn for the piano
• m22 LH hearing an En in between current pitches on beat 3
• m25 RH 1.0 I think this Gb makes more sense written as an F# - the chord of this particularly measure is in C major, and F# is also travelling up to Gn in this instance (on beat 2).
• m29 just remember to put a double bar line with any key changes. However, I don't think changing the key to E major makes much sense here, the song ends on D minor. Would just keep the key change from m19.

• m29 RH beat 3 not hearing a Bn. I think this measure should have two layers: the piano part in layer 1, and the En from beat 1 is the strings, and should be a whole note length in layer 2.
• m30 RH I think you could continue having a second string layer, with D half note on beat 1, and on beat 3 move to C# for half note length
• m31 RH hearing an An between these notes
• m32 RH I think the grace note is just an An down an octave from that pitch

[Metamyrrh]

No worries about the wait. I know there are many submissions. Thank you very much for taking the time to look through it!

m12 LH: I still hear an A# in beat 4.0.

m15-17 LH: For the tremolos, I'm hearing different notes that I have put in as trills. I'm not confident about the pitches and I know the hands crossing is iffy, so let me know if what I have put in is not workable.

m29-30 RH: To avoid clashes, only added the strings layer where the LH is not playing.

Fixed everything else! Here are the updated files: https://www.mediafire.com/file/twpiaky7k1wui8q/I'll+be+close+by+v3.zip/file

[Kricketune54]

m12 LH: I still hear an A# in beat 4.0.

Ah yes, you are correct upon relisten.

m15-17 LH: For the tremolos, I'm hearing different notes that I have put in as trills. I'm not confident about the pitches and I know the hands crossing is iffy, so let me know if what I have put in is not workable.

Just to clarify, the symbol for tremolos looks like this: 

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The symbol currently present indicates trills. Here's an example also of what I was thinking for m15 for example, for what this could look like.

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m29-30 RH: To avoid clashes, only added the strings layer where the LH is not playing.

This looks good.

One other small comment, add a slur to the grace note on m32.

[Metamyrrh]

Thanks for taking a look, sorry for the delayed response! And, sorry, I misunderstood what you meant for the tremolos in m15-17. I tried out what you were thinking and found those tremolos quite awkward to play in that spot. I think a trill is easier to play and gives a similar impression (when executed with the dynamics you notated). Does that work? Also, I added the slur to m32!

Here are the changed files: https://www.mediafire.com/file/729wgpi2uxcgk8o/I'll+be+close+by+v4.zip/file

[Kricketune54]

Okay gotcha. Yeah that looks good now and that work as far as the trills for me. Do have a few more things I reviewed and wanted to run by you.

• m3 LH the lower octave F# might be a little better if you moved it up to a Bn. Then have it restrike on beat 3 as well. Could do m3-4 like this:

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• m14 RH I think you could add an upper octave here of the Bn
• At m26 LH, I think beat 3 sounds more like down an octave.
• Looking at m28 again, I think RH 2.5 the An should go to the second layer, and the Fn stay in layer 1. Currently it looks a little confusing, and I think this will show the melody/harmony separation a bit better.

[Metamyrrh]

Thanks! That m3-m4 sounds great. Updated files: https://www.mediafire.com/file/51xvmp46rxfxd4z/I'll+be+close+by+v5.zip/file

For m14 RH, sorry, what do you mean? A higher Bn is not reachable.

For m28 RH, I agree that the changes make the RH voices clearer. Originally I had the lower Fn in a separate layer to make it clear that the LH should play Fn in beat 2.0. Is it still clear now? Also, m27-28 I added Ds in the RH for the faint string layer.

[Kricketune54]

For m14 RH, sorry, what do you mean? A higher Bn is not reachable.

Typo on my part - meant to say a lower octave Bn. Did you mean to make this a whole note in m14 as well?

For m28 RH, I agree that the changes make the RH voices clearer. Originally I had the lower Fn in a separate layer to make it clear that the LH should play Fn in beat 2.0. Is it still clear now? Also, m27-28 I added Ds in the RH for the faint string layer.

Your change for RH m27 has inspired me to reexamine this section and offer up some additional RH suggestions from what I hear. At m27, you could also add the audible Bb below the Dn in the second layer. But for m28, relistening I think it would make more sense to drop the lower octave Fn, and to just move it up to An (one is heard under the Dn to fill out the chord). You could add in a quarter and 8th rest to layer 2 as well just to fill this out.

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This should be it from me though 

[Metamyrrh]

m14: Got it, added the Bn! Yes, I think it sounds more like the original to sustain all the notes to the end of the measure
m27-28 RH: Changed. My only misgiving is that the LH should strike the same Bb on m27 beat 2.5.

Thank you for the thorough review!

Updated files: https://www.mediafire.com/file/3tgod29c2aku4u2/I'll+be+close+by+v6.zip/file

[Kricketune54]

This sheet is now approved, discussed one final change to m31 RH, which is represented in the newly formatted submission files.