[DELETED] [PS4] Bloodborne - "The First Hunter" by Renaud Bergeron

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Other
Game: Bloodborne
Console: PlayStation 4
Title: The First Hunter
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Renaud Bergeron

[Khunjund]

[Static]

• Have you considered writing the LH part in m1-20 as simple chords and/or with arpeggio markings? Even my medium-sized hands can play D-A-F without much effort, and other chords can just as easily be rolled. I think that better approximates the original track than using 8th notes. Also applies to m83-92.
  I'd also be fine leaving it, however.
• In places like m15 RH, I'd suggest splitting the layers here so it's more clear where the melody is.
• m33-40 LH beat 3/3.5: I hear most of these as G instead of D. You could put some of those harmonies in the RH instead to prioritize the pedal G bass, which I think is important in that section.
• m40 RH beat 3: This should just be a quarter note, there's no A on beat 3.5 here.
• m48 RH beat 3: I'm hearing these 8th notes as A, C instead of G, A.
• m58: This sounds like and A minor chord rather than C major; it's the same as m62.
• m60: Missing an A in this chord
• m64: Should be the same chord as m60, voiced differently of course.
• m67-68: It's subtle, but I think there's a D (m67) and C# (m68)
• m95-96 LH: I'm not convinced this is the best way to write this part out, and it's not really reflective of anything in the original track either. It ends up just sounding too muddy. A low D tremolo I think would work a lot better.
• m107-114: This is the climax of the piece, but it's written rather sparsely. Even just adding a lower octave to the RH melody would make a huge difference.
• m123-130 RH: This would be another good spot to separate the voices and move the melody to its own layer for clarity.
• m127 RH beat 2: Missing a G in the melody here.
• As with your other Bloodborne submission, both FromSoftware and Sony should be listed in the copyright.

[Khunjund]

Changes have been made.

[Kricketune54]

Notes

- m17-18 LH I hear E under the G
- m19 RH last note is C not Bb, m20 is D, E, G
- Maybe consider with m22 inverting the LH as is by moving the C down an octave, and putting an E below it (the E in the original but down an octave from the current one). Could be done for m24, 26, and 28 and many other areas in order to keep the lower bass notes represented as opposed to having the LH being a bit more mid-range in pitch. It is a big change but I think it would help give some sections more depth.
- m28 RH I hear an A under these notes. In m24 RH I hear the same notes (A instead of G)
- m29 RH Maybe add a roll here. These pitches will not be reachable for most hands unless there is a roll, I had a tough time despite having larger than average hands. A roll would also be appropriate considering in the original track the notes come in somewhat gradually.
- m33 RH beat 2.5 I don't hear a G. I think this is a rest here, write the E on 2.0 as a staccato quarter.
- m43 RH beat 1.0 I hear An next to the Bb
- m47 RH beat 1.0 there's An and Bb present here as well above the lower G
- m48 RH beat 1.0 I hear a C in between pitches
- m56 RH first note the G should be down an octave
- m65 same thought as m29
- m67 RH there's a D and a Bb under the F
- m68 RH I don't hear a G but a C# and an A under the En
- m69 RH there's an F next to the E. It also ties over to m70 so maybe put in the 2nd layer or a 3rd layer
- m71-72 LH I hear a En under these notes
- m72 RH I don't hear the A on beat 3 but rather the G is played by both instruments in the original. Maybe add an octave below current instead of A?
- m73 RH there's an F in here between current pitches
- m74 RH I don't hear pitches under the Bb, C, and D moving. I hear a dotted half note D and F underneath, as a 2nd layer.
- m75 RH more pointing this out because I don't think it sounds great and that this part is fine as is, but there is a Bb under the G# that could be represented if pulled up an octave
- m76 LH it's a stretch but on beat 3 I think you could write the C# down to its original octave
- m80 RH there's a D next to the E (half note)

[Khunjund]

Thanks for the feedback. I've made some changes.

[Kricketune54]

Coming back to this one. Just for context did not make it through fully back in April. Continuing from there...

m17-18 LH I hear E under the G

Still hearing this on beat 2

• m60 LH 3.25 I think this is an E
• m63 LH 2.5 and 3.0 I hear a G for boh of these instead of F
• m68 RH still not hearing G on top but hearing Bb under C#
• m81 RH dotted quarter should be an 8th tied to a quarter
• m69 RH maybe move second RH layer a bit to the right so the dot on the Fn isn't hidden
• m97-98 RH maybe make the notes that carry over tied together?
• m102 beat 2.5 hear a An
• m104 RH beat 1 sounds like a dotted quarter, current beat 2 as an 8th note on 2.5
• m107 RH 3.0 think the G should be A still
• m113 LH 1.5 and 2.0 hearing as F's, 2.5 as G
• m115 RH I don't think C makes sense up here maybe just have two F's. The String part it's coming from I'm also not hearing do a G on beat 2.5 was that an arranged note as opposed to heard one?
• m118 LH 3.0 hearing this recurring figure (109,110,112) as two 8th's, just E and G. Highlighting here because were this is most audible
• m120 RH 3.5 hearing a G
• m123 LH 1.0 I think this is a G just like m127

Have you considered writing the LH part in m1-20 as simple chords and/or with arpeggio markings? Even my medium-sized hands can play D-A-F without much effort, and other chords can just as easily be rolled. I think that better approximates the original track than using 8th notes. Also applies to m83-92.

I do want to highlight this from Static last September though, do you have any thoughts on this idea he had?

m95-96 LH: I'm not convinced this is the best way to write this part out, and it's not really reflective of anything in the original track either. It ends up just sounding too muddy. A low D tremolo I think would work a lot better.

Another Static call back, I don't think a trill is the best way to do this. Maybe E quarter note, then do a low D tremolo?

[Kricketune54]

Bump for arranger

[Kricketune54]

Bumping this one again, are you still interested in working on this? Let me know if there's something you disagree with/Static's previous comment, happy to reexamine that

[Kricketune54]

I'm going to archive this submission, if you resubmit in the future, please address myself and Static's comment in your post if that is a point of disagreement.

[Zeta]

This submission has been deleted by Kricketune54.
         
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