[MUL] Dark Souls II - "Aldia, Scholar of the First Sin" by Libera

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Other
Game: Dark Souls II
Console: Multiplatform
Title: Aldia, Scholar of the First Sin
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Libera

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[Libera]

[Bloop]

-m16: I don't specifically hear the low A in the R.H. on beat 3
-m17: I do hear an A in the R.H. on beat 1 (probably written an octave above where it is in the original), and I don't hear the higher octave Bb on beat 2.
-m18: I hear an additional C# in the piano part on beat 3.
-m20 and 42: The F in the R.H. beat 1 should be an E.
-m38: Maybe you could add a courtesy accidental to the Bb on beat 3 in the R.H., since this and m37 are very Bn-based.
-m57-61: Maybe it'd make sense to write the G#'s in this part as Ab's? In the rest of the sheet the G#'s all resolve to A in some way, but here they seem to resolve to Gn instead.

[Libera]

-m16: I don't specifically hear the low A in the R.H. on beat 3
-m17: I do hear an A in the R.H. on beat 1 (probably written an octave above where it is in the original), and I don't hear the higher octave Bb on beat 2.
-m18: I hear an additional C# in the piano part on beat 3.
-m20 and 42: The F in the R.H. beat 1 should be an E.
-m38: Maybe you could add a courtesy accidental to the Bb on beat 3 in the R.H., since this and m37 are very Bn-based.
-m57-61: Maybe it'd make sense to write the G#'s in this part as Ab's? In the rest of the sheet the G#'s all resolve to A in some way, but here they seem to resolve to Gn instead.

All great points!  They should be all fixed, apart from I still hear the high Bb in bars 17/39, although it's a little quiet.  I went back and forth regarding the accidentals in 57-61, but I think you're right that the Abs make more sense than the G#s.  I think I was trying to be consistent with everywhere else, but I don't think it's worth it.

I also made some small misc. edits, but more importantly I've reworked bars 42-44 to get the low piano octaves in there.  (Not sure why I left them out in the first place.)

Thanks for checking!

[Bloop]

Ah yeah I hear that Bb now too. Awesome, looking good then!
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[Latios212]

Looking good, some of these chords sound a bit more dissonant on piano than they do in the original but I don't have any particular suggestions.

A few minor points:
- m. 15 beat 1 RH: There's a D at the bottom of this chord you could write in
- m. 22 beats 2-3 LH: Would it make sense to lower the upper layer an octave to match the previous couple of measures? It sounds to me like the same voice descending
- m. 45 beat 3.5 RH: I think this is a G?
- m. 48 beats 2-2.5: I think I hear a C on beat 2 and nothing on 2.5
- m. 53-54 - the whole notes are running into the half note stems

[Libera]

- m. 15 beat 1 RH: There's a D at the bottom of this chord you could write in
- m. 22 beats 2-3 LH: Would it make sense to lower the upper layer an octave to match the previous couple of measures? It sounds to me like the same voice descending
- m. 53-54 - the whole notes are running into the half note stems

Should be fixed.  Although I only put the C# down the octave in bar 22.  I think that gives a more balanced sound.

- m. 45 beat 3.5 RH: I think this is a G?
- m. 48 beats 2-2.5: I think I hear a C on beat 2 and nothing on 2.5

Honestly I'm not sure I can hear anything anymore on beat 3.5 of bar 45, so I took it out.  In bar 48, I hear the A and the C on beat 2, and then the C again on beat 2.5.  I wrote it this way because I think it makes the RH a little more consistent, and the harmony is still exactly the same.

Looking good, some of these chords sound a bit more dissonant on piano than they do in the original but I don't have any particular suggestions.

Yeah, the orchestration spaces things out a bit better than we can here, but I still think it sounds pretty good.  Thanks for checking!

[Latios212]

Neato, everything looks good. I'll accept!

[Zeta]

This submission has been accepted by Latios212.

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot