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[MUL] One Piece: Pirate Warriors 2 - "Overpower" by Fantastic Ike

Started by Zeta, September 30, 2021, 07:13:04 AM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Other
Game: One Piece: Pirate Warriors 2
Console: Multiplatform
Title: Overpower
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Fantastic Ike

[attachment deleted by admin]

Fantastic Ike

I tried my best on this one. Got a suggestion to mix up octaves in order to make the bass line tolerable to play, please let me know if there's anything I need to fix! I'm not the best at this stuff, I know haha


Bloop

Quote from: Fantastic Ike on September 30, 2021, 07:15:28 AMI'm not the best at this stuff, I know haha
Don't worry, we all keep learning! This looks pretty good already, as you have most important notes down and all rhythms correctly written out (with one exception - I'll get to that). There are quite a lot of second voices you've left out though, which could be included fairly easily. I've noted most of these down in my comments below, though it's good to go through the song so you can really hear them too.

Anyway, here are my comments
-m1-2: I can hear a voice going G-Ab-G, An-Bb-An, and Bb-Cb-Bb along with the accents. You can add these in between the voices of the R.H.
-m3: I hear the last two quarters in the R.H. as G and En respectively (instead of En and F). Also, you could add a pedal marking at beat 4 of m2 extending until the end of m3, so the notes of the last accent are being held until the end.
-Also, I think you can remove the accents in these intro 3 bars, as you have it in fortissimo already. If every note has an accent, they don't differ from eachother.
-m4: Weirdly, I hear the rhythm guitar riff as an Ab instead of a G? It doesn't make sense in a metal riff like this though, and the bass does play G. Weird. Anyway, about the riff itself: I think it would be better if you switch the octaves around, so low octave 8ths and high octave 16ths. I think the low octaves have a bit more punch the accentuate the beats, and alternating between the first and second finger of the L.H. is a bit easier than the 4th and 5th. You can keep the notes with the accents in the low octave too.
-m8: I hear the second voice in the R.H. go to an Ab on beat 1.75. Same in m12
-m9: You can add the second voice to the R.H. part here too from beat 3 on: it goes Ab-G-D-D-D until beat 1.5 of m10. Also, I think you can just have the slur go from the Bb in beat 2.5 to the last note of this measure, or even the first note of the next measure. The same applies to m13, as well as m17 and m21.
-m14: Shouldn't there be two eighth note accents here too like in m10?
-m16: I hear an F and an En above the D and Db in beats 1.75 and 2.5. Also, the D on beat 3.75 is played shortly, so you can remove the tie and change the 8th note on beat 4 to an eighth rest (and ofcourse leave the Db)
Also also, there are some options you can do with multiple layers: you could, for example, have the trumpet hits on beats 3 and 4 played an octave higher, so you can hold the Db and En until the next bar, or just make one layer hold the En while the second layer plays the trumpet hits in the octave you have currently.
Same thing applies to m20 and m28 btw.
-m23: I'd change the Fb in beat 4 of the L.H. to an En, as this is the fifth of an A major chord.
-m24-27: Same thing about the shortened notes in the trumpets. Also, I hear a second voice in the trumpets which you could easily add in to the right hand. It could be a good practice to train your ear a bit with transcribing these notes, but if you're really stuck or wanna check what you have is correct, this is what I hear:
Spoiler
F-Bb-Bb, Ab-Db-Db, Bb-F-En
[close]
-m32-39: I'd remove the accents here and just put it in fortissimo, so this is visually the same vibe as the intro. Also, you could listen a bit more closely to which trumpet notes are played staccato, so you could add staccato markings to them (like the two 8ths on beat 3 of m33)
-m35: I'd lengthen the first slur to the Db on beat 3, and the second slur to the C on beat 4.5. I'd also add this second slur to the L.H.
-m40-47: There's a second voice playing along with the guitar here too, which I don't really feel like spelling out for you completely too:
-m42: Again, change the Fb to En in the L.H. You should change the Db in the R.H. to a C#, as this is an A major chord. Same things in m46.
-m43: I hear an F on beat 2.5 in the R.H. (instead of a G). Also, this is the only time you actually have a grace note written for a guitar bend, but there are a lot more of this in the track. I'd suggest adding some of those in as well, or just removing this one, to be consistent throughout the sheet.
-m50: The trumpet hits in the second layer are all a major second up (So A-En and G#-D#). Also, the rhythm of these hits is incorrectly beamed: the first note should be an eighth note with a staccato (as it's shorter as well), then a 16th rest, then the second (16th) note, and then continue like you have. You should change this Db in the first layer to a C# too, like in m42.
-m51: I'd write the dotted quarter rests as a quarter rest and an 8th rest: you usually don't put dots on quarter rests, unless you're in 6/8 or something like that. The first layer note on beat 2.5 should be an F too, like in m43. Also, the trumpets do something different in this bar, though it doesn't fit as well with the guitar part. You could do something like this:
You cannot view this attachment.
-Changing around the stuff in m50 and m51 makes that the accidentals will get very close together. I suggest moving the some measures down a system, so the measure distribution on this page will be 3-2-3-3-4 bars.
-m54: Again, the Db in the R.H. should be C#.
-m55: The trumpets in this part go quarter notes Ab-C-Eb-Ab, but this interferes a bit with the first layer. I'd suggest writing it as Eb-Ab-C-Eb. It's definitely not G and Bb like you have now though.
-m56-59: Same comments as the intro, with regards to the second voice and the last two quarter notes. The second voice in the 3/4 bar just goes Bb-Bb-Bb, though you may wanna leave out the first Bb so all three note figures start on G.
-m60: This is a selfmade ending, right? It might be nice to add text box saying "Optional Ending", just so the player knows it's not technically part of the song. Also, you may wanna add accents to the two 8th notes in the L.H., as they are usually accented everywhere else in the song.

Fantastic Ike

Wow, that's a lot of stuff I had to fix haha. It was really hard figuring out some of the other voices and I don't know if I would've done it without your help. Thanks for the feedback, I'm pretty sure I fixed all of the suggested changes. It's weird, now it sounds "less" accurate now that I have some of the other harmonies in but that's probably just due to the instrument changes.

Quote-m4:Weirdly, I hear the rhythm guitar riff as an Ab instead of a G? It doesn't make sense in a metal riff like this though, and the bass does play G.
Yeah I noticed that too. I honestly think it's just the guitar distortion making it slightly out of tune. It's like a G half sharp.

Quote-m51:Also, the trumpets do something different in this bar, though it doesn't fit as well with the guitar part.
Yeah, I agonized over this measure more than any other. Nothing I did sounded "right."

Anyway please let me know if there's anything else I need to fix!

Bloop

Nice work on these changes! There's a few more details that popped up though:

-You should probably nudge the dynamic markings around a bit so they're centered in the white space between the two staves (e.g. fortissimo in m1 is a bit low and the forte in m4 is a bit high)
-About the pedal markings: pedal markings should go under the bottom staff, instead of between the staves. Also, I'm not sure why you have a dashed line between the ped and * marks, did you edit that in or did that just happen? Let me know if you need help on removing the dashed line!
-m3: The stem of quarter note on beat 1 of the L.H. should be pointing upwards (you can use L toflip the direction of note stems)
-m16, 20 and 28: You could still add in the Db on beat 2.5, but just as an 8th note and not tied to a half note. Also, some nitpicky tie things: you could flip the ties of the F on beat 1.75 and the En on beat 2.5, so they go over instead of under (you can use Ctrl+F while on the starting note to flip its tie)
-m24-26: Adding the bottom octaves to the R.H. notes is fine for more power, but you should probably add one on beat 2.5 of m24 too for consistency.
-m27: The Gb on beat 4 of the L.H. should be a F# (leading tone to G in the next bar)
-m32-38: Maybe you could add an octave above the L.H. G's during the accented guitar notes, like you did in the intro and outro? Also, I think you could add the staccatos that are in the R.H. to the L.H. too.
-m40-54: Anytime you have this tresillo rhythm (You cannot view this attachment.), the second note should be played short, so you could remove the ties and eighth notes. The only exception is m47.
-m42 and 46: The Db in the R.H. should be C#, and the Fb in the L.H. should be En. Chromatically the Db and Fb do make more sense, but because this is an A major chord, I think the C# and En take preference. Technically, this would be a Bbb major chord, but that's very uncommon and difficult to read.
-m55: Minor thing, but you could move the quarter note Eb in the R.H. on beat 4 to the second layer, because this is part of the trumpet line and note the guitar line. You could then change the quarter note G on beat 3 to a half note again.
-m56-57: You forgot to add in the second voice like you did in m1-2. You could just copy over m1 and 2 and delete the tempo mark and the ties at the end.

Fantastic Ike

Should have all those changes fixed! One question though:

Quote-m40-54: Anytime you have this tresillo rhythm, the second note should be played short, so you could remove the ties and eighth notes. The only exception is m47.

I'm assuming you just meant for m40-54, but the tresillo rhythm pops up in a lot of other places. Should I change it everywhere else? Thanks.

Bloop

Yeah I meant mainly for m40-54, usually when the electric guitar plays that rhythm, it's a bit dubious how long it's playing: it's usually more in the 16th-tied to-16th range, but I personally think 16th-tied to-8th works well enough too. In m40-54, however, it's definitely more like just a 16th like the brass do throughout the track, so I felt like that distinction was worth changing.

The only things left to do are these:
Quote from: Bloop on October 17, 2021, 01:47:27 AM-m3: The stem of quarter note on beat 1 of the L.H. should be pointing upwards (you can use L to flip the direction of note stems)
-m32-38: Maybe you could add an octave above the L.H. G's during the accented guitar notes, like you did in the intro and outro? Also, I think you could add the staccatos that are in the R.H. to the L.H. too.
And two small thingies:
-m51: The natural before the D in the R.H. on beat 2.5 doesn't need to be in brackets: brackets are used when something is technically natural, but it could be ambiguous because of context. This D just follows a Db, so it has to have a natural.
-m52: You forgot to change one of the tresillo rhythms here

Fantastic Ike

Okay, think I fixed everything. Sorry, I thought I got it all the first time!

Bloop

Just two more things, but that should be all of me, sorry! You could just edit the mus file and export the files later once another updater gives additional changes.
In m3, I meant flipping the stem of the quarter note in the left hand, not the right hand. It should look like this:
You cannot view this attachment.
Also, now that you added the octaves in m32, the ff is touching the beam of the top note: you can fix this by moving the bottom staff down a bit with the Staff Tool.

Fantastic Ike


Bloop

Awesome, glad you can respond so quickly! I'll approve of this one then! You cannot view this attachment.

Fantastic Ike


Static

  • Copyright info is missing the developer (Omega Force).
  • m4/60 RH beat 1: There's a D (and another G an octave below the top one) you could add if you want, but it's not necessary.
  • m8/12/16/20 RH beat 1: There's a D under the G here.
  • m9/13/17/21/29 RH beat 4.5: The lower voice should be F instead of D.
  • m15 beats 3-4: Since the RH isn't doing anything here, you could expand the range out a bit to match the original:

    Up to you though, it's fine as you have it too.
  • m16/20/28 RH beat 2.75: This tie should be flipped up because of the 2nd Layer that comes in.
  • m19/23/31/50 RH: Any time you have this four-note marcato figure, the third note is actually slurred into the last one, not separated. You could use a slur or a tenuto mark for those.
  • m19 LH beats 4: The bass goes to Ab here, matching the quarter note in the RH.
  • m24-27 LH: This is one of those tension-building sections, and one of the main things that builds tension is that the chords change over a pedal Bb bass. Instead of having the LH move along with the RH, I would keep it as Bb the entire time though, until that F# on beat 4 of m27. Note that the middle note changes from F in m24 to En in the following bars. You could also lower it an octave in m26-27, as the RH moves up, if you want. Just throwing some ideas out there.

    (don't adjust the measure distribution like this, I just did it to take a smaller screenshot)
  • All of your marcato markings look a little skewed to the left side of each note, they should be in the center.
  • m32 RH beat 3, m34 RH beats 1/3: There's a D under the G in these places.
  • m33/35/37 RH beat 2.5-4: There's another horn voice that plays here, it's not just all in unison.
  • m36 RH beat 1: There should be a D under the G.
  • m49 LH: Bass goes to Bb here, like in m53.
  • m58 RH: You're missing the Eb-D voice under the Ab-G.

Cool sheet

Fantastic Ike

Think that should be everything, please let me know what else I need to change.

Static

Looks good, just a last handful of things from me:
  • m15 RH beats 3-4: You could add accents in the RH too to match the LH, if you want to.
  • m19 RH beat 2.25: This last 16th note could still be marked marcato, even with the slur leading into it, but what you have fine too. Not much of a difference in how it'll be played either way.
  • m33 RH beat 2.5: These 16th notes are actually both the same (C-F dyad); it moves to G-D on beat 3 instead of 2.75.
  • m35 RH beat 3: The Gb should be G natural.
  • m39 RH beats 3-4: I missed it before, but there's also some harmony here, a 4th below the melody.
  • m59 LH beat 1: Since there's only one layer here, this quarter note can be flipped upwards like in m3 LH.