Atcero's Color Project Sheets

[Atcero]

Oh boy, project time. I failed attempted 3 other sheets before finally settling on Platinum Moonlight as my second sheet. But it works, I guess.

Also now that I have full finale, I formatted it to what I could remember the guidelines are but if there are mistakes please let me know so I can fully format it and learn :kekdog:

[DS] Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow

Pitch Black Intrustion [REPLACEMENT]
[PDF] [MIDI] [MUSX] [MUS]

Platinum Moonlight
[PDF] [MIDI] [MUSX] [MUS]

[Zeila]

If you edited it recently, then some of this may be outdated since I did most of the checking ~2 weeks ago

Formatting

• Most dynamics aren't centered (both horizontally and vertically)
• The crescendo in measure 6 is touching the barline, so you should move the open end a bit to the left
• D.C. should be D.S., and I would personally raise it just a tad
• The first system on page 2 is a little too close to the header
• You should visibly show the 2nd layer rests (and for the eighth note rests, you should raise those to avoid colliding with the whole notes
• Some of the note lengths could be shortened since it sounds disconnected as opposed to smooth in some parts (e.g. the first note of measures 10-12 and 14, or the half notes in measures 11/12/16)
• You should split the dotted quarter notes in measures 10/14 too

Notes

• m6 LH beat 3-4 sounds like G-D-B-G all in descending order
• m7 LH last note sounds like A instead of F
• m8 LH last note sounds like B instead of G
• m10-12 and others RH it sounds like there's a space between the first dotted quarter note and the next one, so you could write it out as a quarter note + eighth rest
• m25/27 RH you could include more of the harmony here, but if you'd rather only use dyads then I think the line that just does A throughout this measure is more prominent than the one that does D/C on the offbeats
• m26 RH missing G# and I think it would be better to write the E as D instead
• m28 RH beat 2 G sounds like A instead; then on beats 3 and 4 it plays the lower notes from beats 1-2 again so the E and A are doubled
• m29 RH beat 1 E should be F; the same thing from measures 25/27 apply here too, except the note is F instead of A
• m31-32 RH it would be nice to include an F# and G# in both measures respectively
• measures 15/16 are actually different on the repeat

[Atcero]

Updated Pitch Black Intrusion! Sorry it took so long, was moving and then couldnt get playback to work

[Static]

Platinum Moonlight
- The tied notes in the LH (between beats 2-3) sound shorter to me in the original, like there should be a rest on beat 3 instead. The reverb makes the note sound a bit lengthened, but I just don't hear the note itself that long.
- Dn in m6/14 should be Cx (chromatic neighbor tone)
- For m9-12 LH, consider putting the low notes in a separate layer. This more clearly indicates that the C's and B's on beat 1.5 of those measures should be played with the RH
- For m13-16 LH, the 2nd low note is impossible to play as you have it written because the RH is playing the melody now. I'd suggest removing it and just leaving the one on the downbeat.
- With a bit of hand-switching technique (this doesn't need to be explicitly notated), the high piano notes in m9-12 would be a cool addition. I'm getting B-C for m9 and 11, and A#-B for m10 and 12, all minor 2nds.
- m17/19 RH beat 4: The C in the lower voice should be D
- m18 RH beat 1.5: This beat should be D#-Fx instead of E-Gn
- m21-22: There's a middle voice here that you could include if you want (it appears in 23-24 and later also but gets in the way of the piano part)
- I think arpeggio markings work better in this case instead of grace notes, since they indicate the lower notes should be held as well and are part of the chord. You can find these markings under Articulations. Also note that some of the pitches you had were wrong (see image below for correct notes)
- m24 RH: Last note should be Db instead of C
- m25-28 LH: Last 2 notes in each bar should be moved up a third
- C's and D's in m29 and 30 beat 2.5/4.5 should be octaves
- m32 RH: Gbs should be F#s (D7b9 chord)
- With the above changes implemented for m21-32, here's how that would look (ignore the measure numbers, I did this in a separate file):

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[Atcero]

All updated. As Radiak and I talked last night, Radiak found it was a B-C-G chord for m9, so I added that in and then A#-B-F# for m10. Hopefully that works! Thank you!

[Static]

Most of the changes look great, just a last handful of things:

• To me at least, the notes on beat 2.5 of the LH pattern starting in m1 still sounds like it shouldn't be tied, but it's fine to leave it. The reverb in the original makes it seem longer anyway.
• Those RH chords in m9-12 sound an octave higher to me in the original.
• m21 RH: I would move that arpeggio marking down a bit, so it's more in line with the chord.
• m21-23, 25-27 RH: Some of those arpeggio markings seem a bit close to the barline/chords. You can space them apart more by highlighting those measures > right click > Edit Measure Attributes > Extra Space at Beginning > set to 0.05-7ish
• m21-22 LH: I'm hearing a continuation of that middle voice on beats 3-4 of these measures; you can add it if you want, or leave it out that's fine too:
  
• m25-27 LH: The C, C and Bb on beat 2 of these measures I hear as Eb, Eb, and Db.
• The top system on page 2 could be moved down a bit, it's pretty close to the top text.

[Atcero]

All updated! Thank you

[Static]

Looks awesome! This is almost finished, I just noticed some extra small stuff:
- The Gbs in m29-30 should be F#s (chromatic neighbor tone)
- maybe move the arpeggio marking in m21 down a bit more, so it's more aligned with the chord

[Atcero]

All updated!

[Static]

I give this sheet the platinum seal of approval

[Libera]

Platinum Moonlight

Do you have full finale now?  I see an musx.


My main comment on this is that while the left hand has many of the right notes present and the right chords are outlined, the notes picked often aren't correct or the best candidates for making a left hand that 'feels' like the original.  Here's all of the notes in the original for bars 1-2:

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And here's my suggestion for how to turn that into a left hand:

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My reasoning for this is pretty much just that it's better to take the lower notes than to take the upper notes and put them an octave down.  This way the bass moves in the same way as it does in the original, and also it has the voice throughout the whole bar being consistent.  In a vacuum, I'd say that it'd be better to leave the dyad on beat 2.5 un-inverted, because it sounds more accurate, but it ends up overlapping with notes later on in the right hand so this is probably the better decision.  You could leave it as it is and then invert it only when the RH comes in, but it's also nice to have the left hand be consistent.

Second left hand section, in bars 17-18.  This bit is significantly harder for me to make out, but I hear something like this:

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And my recommendation for the left hand here:

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My reasoning here is pretty much the same as last time, but it also has the added bonus of sounding much less muddy than the current left hand.


Some other miscellaneous things that maybe you can fix yourself now if you have full finale.  If you need any help let me know.

-Do you want the symmetric margins at 0.64ish?  You could take the RH margin to 0.5 to give your music a little more space if you wanted.
-The url/copyright isn't quite aligned to the bottom margin.
-The angle on the cross staffed beam in beat 24 is a little too flat.  Try to align to the contour of the notes like for a normal beam.  Something like this:

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-Since the second half of the left hand in bar 23 is a continuation of the line in the RH, I think it'd make more sense to put a leading line to show the line moving from the right to the left hand.  Something like this:

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-The bottommost ties on the chords in 9-12 are colliding with the tails of the chords to varying degrees.  You may want to tidy those up a little by moving the left part of the ties to the right a bit.
-The composer and arranger info are perhaps a little close together.

I hope that helps.

[Atcero]

All updated, thank you so much!

[Static]

Pitch Black Intrusion

• m1-8: The RH part in m1-6 should be voiced in 5ths/6ths, and the voicing is a little different in m7-8. In m7, the melody goes up instead of down. It's easier to hear I think when the track is lowered an octave in Audacity/Audiostretch, because that part is very high in the original. This is what I'm getting:
  
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• m9-24 LH: I like this more custom LH part which has a greater range, but some of the chords don't line up with the originals. The chord progression goes Am-D/A-Bdim-Emaj for each 4 bars. In addition, the actual bass plays G# on beat 4 of every E major measure. With all this in mind, something like this I think would be more accurate:
  
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• m16 RH: That half note in the melody sounds more like a quarter note to me, there's a rest after it.
• m17-24 RH: I don't hear the lower harmony here, but like with the LH part, I would try to make the harmony match with the underlying chords:
• m18/22 RH beat 2.5: Move the B to an A (D/A chord).
• m19 RH beat 2: Move the C to B (Bdim).
• m24 RH beat 2: Move the E to F# (matches with m16).
• All of those triplet 16th rhythms should just be normal 16th notes. The tied notes in m25/27/29 start right on beat 3, and the rhythms in m35/37 are just 16th-16th-8th.
• m25-32 RH: There are actually only 2 voices playing throughout this section:
• m25 RH beat 4: There is no F here.
• m26 RH should just be G#-B (no lower B or D).
• m27 RH beat 4: There's no E here.
• m28 RH beats 3-4: Remove the lower E and A on each of these beats.
• m29 RH beat 4: The C should be the F above it.
• m30 RH beats 1-2: The lower voice goes E-C instead of C-G.
• m31-32 RH: Keep these chords the same, it sounds like there's additional voices that come in here.
• m33-34 RH: You could add extra harmonies here like you did it in m23-24.
• m33-34 LH: There's an added bassline in the string bass that comes in here, I think it might be worthwhile to include.
• m35-38 RH: These brass chords should have some extra notes. The chords in m35/37 starting with the 8th note on beat 2.5 should have a C and A underneath, and the whole note chords in m36/38 should have D#, C, and A underneath.
• m36/38 LH: There is no bass/timpani note on beat 1. It should be an 8th rest in the LH, with only the RH chord actually playing on the downbeat. In addition, the arpeggio through the measure has two voices in the original. You only included the lower one (all the notes are correct), but maybe consider just using the upper one (starts on F# instead of D#).
• For the last two systems, instead of using 4 measures then 2 measures, just use 3 systems per measure. It looks more evenly spaced that way.

[Atcero]

All updated I believe, thank you!

[Static]

Most of the changes look good. Just a few more things:

- m4 RH beat 3: The lower note should be G instead of F.
- m7-8 RH: The middle voice should look like the screenshot I posted (C-F-D-B).
- m10/14/18/22 LH beats 3-4: The Es should be F#s.
- m24/34 RH beat 2: My mistake here, the lower note should be G#, not F#, sorry about that.

All of those triplet 16th rhythms should just be normal 16th notes. The tied notes in m25/27/29 start right on beat 3, and the rhythms in m35/37 are just 16th-16th-8th.

- ^ This looks unchanged from before.
- m25-32 LH: The upper notes would probably be more appropriate if you had them on beats 2 and 4 only, since that lines up with the snare drum in the original, or just have them on every downbeat. You have them on mostly offbeats (beat 2.5, 3.5, 4.5) which doesn't quite have the same feel.
- m25 LH: This chord is a Bm7b5 chord, so the bass should be B instead of D. The upper note could be An or Fn, An probably sounds better.
- m28 LH: This is an Am7/G chord not Gmaj, so the upper note should be E.
- m32 LH beat 4: The bass changes to G# here, you don't have to write that down but I thought I'd mention it.
- m33-34 LH: To better show the bass motion, you could write it in octaves, changing the surrounding notes as you see fit. This is one solution:

- m35/37 RH beats 3-4: Both of these chords should have both A and C (both chords should be 3 notes like on beat 2.5).
- m36/38 LH beat 1: Unhide the 8th rests here.