[MUL] Rome: Total War - "Divinitus" by hamishbrown

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Other
Game: Rome: Total War
Console: Multiplatform
Title: Divinitus
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: hamishbrown

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[hamishbrown]

Don't have finale and there are some things I can't correct such as the quaver rests intersecting the notes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=irXQid4peS0

[hamishbrown]

Oh and can someone add crotchet/quarter note = 58 please. I can't figure out how to do that in notepad.

[Libera]

I remember playing this game many, many years ago.  I had forgotten the soundtrack though entirely, so thanks for reminding me of it!  Generally speaking I think the sheet's pretty good but there are a few comments I have:

-Firstly, I think the left hand accompaniment could do with some extra uniformity.  The way you've written at the moment has some sudden double/triple notes which I'm not wholly convinced are in the original, and even if they are I think the sheet would be better served with uniform, arpeggio-like accompaniment patterns.  You also have some missing/incorrect left hand notes in places (like bar 7, 9, 15, 16, 18, 19 and 21).  I think perhaps some of the chords/dyads you have written in may be the result of hearing left-over notes from previously in the bar as well, perhaps?
-Secondly, I think that the harmony line in the vocals should be inverted below the melody line.  In the recording, they mix the harmony line much lower than the melody line which means the melody comes out very clearly, but on piano we don't really have that privilege; my solution is to bring the harmonies below the melody as our ears tend to hear the top notes as the most prominent when everything is at the same volume.  I really, really strongly suggest this as at the moment you're losing the correct impact at the eponymous 'Divinitus' in bar 21 which is a real shame in my view.

After those two comments, there are some other various minor suggestions:

-You're missing the a Db semiquaver on beat 3.75 in bar 6 in the vocal line.
-The harmony line in bar 12 should have an Fn on beat 4.75.
-The dotted rests in bars 5, 17 and 20 (and any that I missed) should be rewritten as quaver + semiquaver rests.  (We generally reserve dotted rests for compound time signatures or if the sheet is getting really messy.)
-Some quaver rests are inside notes in places (like bar 15) and so should be moved up.
-Generally speaking some of the clef changes I feel like could better placed to reduce ledger lines and aid consistency.
-The dynamic placement is a little off.  Sometimes you have them colliding with other things on the page, and the first piano dynamic should probably be placed in between the staves rather than below.  The dynamics should also probably come in to match the vocals rather than the starts of the bars, I think.
-The slur at the end should probably finish above the fermata rather than below, I think at least.
-I think everything would look a bit cleaner with three bars per system and four systems on page one, five on page two.  This gives a little more room for the clef changes as well, keeping things from getting scrunched up too much.  It also allows you to make better use of your second page, which you're currently only using about half of.
-It looked like the page numbers were messed up in your mus file.

Now perhaps some of that feedback was a little vague, but that was because I've actually whipped up a file for you to look at.  I've made all of the changes above to this file and so you can see exactly what I mean by what I've said.  The most 'up to interpretation' point I made was the one about the left hand accompaniment, so feel free to tinker with it further to your liking, but at least you can see sort of what I'm going for by looking at this.  Here it is: https://www.dropbox.com/s/v2cgypihc8j4yxc/Divinitus%20%28Libera%20Edit%29.mus?dl=0

If you've got any questions about any of this, definitely ask and I can go further in depth / say new things.  Also, if you are happy with that file then feel free to use it, there's not much point in doing the work twice if you like what you see.


There was one thing I didn't change though, which was the pedal markings.  I've never seen pedal markings like that before, and maybe they'd be better replaced with something more standard (if this is just a case of me not being familiar with it then let me know.)  Also, I added the tempo marking like you asked.

[hamishbrown]

Hey,

Thanks for all of your advice and for making the edit. It all looks great to me. Perhaps it should say "arranged by hamishbrown and libera?"When I make arrangements I have a fixation with trying to put everything in it's correct octave but in this case I think you've chosen the musically best option of putting the harmony line below the melody. And I've only just noticed the pedal markings, I have no idea why they look like that. In Musescore they looked like this: https://gyazo.com/b3122e6ed23c760833737bc3aba80612 So I don't know why the conversion process chose to change them in that way. I'm not sure if I'm going completely insane, but in finale notepad, whenever I try to move the pedal markings so that they look nice and uniform, they back into a poor position whenever I scroll. How am I supposed to place them somewhere and make sure they don't move? Can anyone help?

[Libera]

I'm not sure if I'm going completely insane, but in finale notepad, whenever I try to move the pedal markings so that they look nice and uniform, they back into a poor position whenever I scroll. How am I supposed to place them somewhere and make sure they don't move? Can anyone help?

You're not; it's a stupid bug finale has with articulations sometimes.  I've only encountered it before with brackets, but I guess it can happen to pedal markings too.  I use the smartshape pedal markings rather than the articulation ones which avoids this issue entirely, so I edited your sheet to remove the articulation markings and replace them with the smartshape ones; it should be good now.  (Just use the link I gave you before, I've updated it to this file.)  Once the pedal markings are updated, I'll give this my approval I think.

Perhaps it should say "arranged by hamishbrown and libera?"

Totally up to you, really.  Updaters don't tend to put their names on sheets after editing them because we do it so often, but I admit that I probably did a bit more editing here than I usually do.  So yeah, up to you, feel free to keep credit to yourself if you want as I won't mind.

[hamishbrown]

OK I have submitted that file. Thanks for the edits.

[Libera]

OK I have submitted that file. Thanks for the edits.

It seems like the smartshape pedal markings I put in have been replaced by articulation pedal markings, so they're misaligned again.  They're still smartshape markings in the file I put on dropbox.

Also I think it would probably be better if it said 'Arranged by hamishbrown, Edited by Libera' if you want to credit me in some way.  Like this:
You cannot view this attachment.

I just think that would better reflect the actuality of the collaboration, if that makes sense.

[hamishbrown]

Well spotted, I have re-uploaded your file with your suggestion, hopefully, I formatted it correctly. I don't know really know what the standard procedure is with this kind of thing.

[Libera]

Sweet.

[Latios212]

Looks pretty sweet, good work you two.

One comment about notes: I think m. 9 is missing a pickup to it, like here:
You cannot view this attachment.

And a couple of aesthetic things:
- Last measure could use a bit more space at the beginning.
- I think there are some places where flipping a note or tie in the lower staff would look a bit neater, like beat 3 of m. 3-4 and the ties in m. 18-20 for example, among a few other places.

I can make the above edits for you if you like since you have Notepad. Here's a file you can use: https://www.dropbox.com/s/0hwuysiuk6ojn5k/Divinitus.mus?dl=1

[hamishbrown]

Ok cool I have uploaded that file, thanks.

[Latios212]

Cool!

[Zeta]

This submission has been accepted by Latios212.

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