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[SW] Fire Emblem Engage - "Silver-White Heart" by Libera

Started by Zeta, June 11, 2023, 10:40:45 AM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Fire Emblem
Game: Fire Emblem Engage
Console: Nintendo Switch
Title: Silver-White Heart
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Libera

[attachment deleted by admin]

Libera


Static

Not much to say really. Looks great!

- m21 RH beat 1: Melody should be D A here instead of B F#.
- m24: The crescendo is just barely grazing the top of that sharp.
- m25 RH beat 1: The grace note sounds like a D to me, like it's restruck on that beat.
- m40 LH beat 3.5: I hear the guitar playing an F# there (in the staff). The B is played by a string voice so you could put that in the RH.

Zeila

Nice work on this!! I agree with most of Static's comments

Quote from: Static on June 19, 2023, 11:23:06 AM- m40 LH beat 3.5: I hear the guitar playing an F# there (in the staff). The B is played by a string voice so you could put that in the RH.
I agree with this suggestion, but I hear a B played by the guitar as well. I think what happens is that sometimes there are two guitar notes at once, like what I hear in measure 26 for example
You cannot view this attachment.

Other than that, here's what I got:
  • How did you hide the rests in the first eight measures and very last measure to the point where they are completely invisible past the "hidden" markings? I don't even see anything with the note shape tool, nor do I see any kind of blank notation staff style. Btw, the way you did the courtesy key signature was quite elegant
  • m. 8 beat 3 sounds like it's just a quarter note. If the low A on beat 3.5 is just that quiet, then I think it should have parentheses or something else to signify that it's softer in comparison. The only type of sound I hear is an unpitched string release or something like that
  • m. 10/17/18 were the beaming differences here compared to measures 9 or 11 intentional?
  • m. 22 RH I hear B->A instead of D->C# under the top notes
  • m. 25 I'm unsure, but I'm hearing something like this with a tiny pinch of rubato. The G is softer in comparison, and the RH could play the first two eighth notes
    You cannot view this attachment.
  • m. 26 LH beat 3 as what I notated in the first picture, I think this is a D instead of a B, but idk
  • m. 30 LH beat 2 sounds like a D instead of G
  • m. 30 LH beat 3 there's a low F playing throughout the measure and I think it would sound better if you put one on beat 3. You could just have the RH take the G at the top (with split stems or a bracket to notate it unless you want to leave it ambiguous) so that the LH wouldn't have to play a 9th interval
  • m. 33 LH beat 2.5 I'm hearing B#->D# instead of G#->A#
  • m. 35-38/43-46 maybe you could put arpeggio markings on beat 1 in all or some of these measures
  • m. 35/36 I do hear a high D on beat 3, but I hear one an octave lower too and feel like that's more prominent sounding to me
  • m. 35 I think this has an A# in it too
  • m. 36 much less sure about this one, but there is like a hint of dissonance that might be an E# here as well
  • m. 37 I think there's a D# in the first chord that you could replace the E in the RH with
  • m. 38 RH it sounds like there's a low D# in the first chord too. Just an observation really, I don't expect you to add it unless it's arpeggiated
  • m. 38 LH beat 3 I think the last two notes are an An and F#
  • m. 41 I think it's more important to at least partially finish the melody phrase instead of prioritizing the high strings here. Here's one suggestion, although if you don't like how the voices kind of blend together then that's okay too!
    You cannot view this attachment.
  • m. 43 I hear an A# here too just like in measure 35
  • m. 45 I think there's a C# in that chord too

XiaoMigros

  • m24: I think the B in the chord at beat 1 should, be an A, but I'm not sure. I do hear a string voice (A-G-A-B) on beats 2 and 3 which you could addd if you like
  • m25: Alternatively to Zeila's suggestion, you could add just the low G on beat 2 (borrowed from a strings part)
  • m27: I feel like you could let beat 3 stand out a bit more here, it has a more weighted feel in the original than in your sheet. Maybe a low F in the RH, or something to a similar effect?
Quote from: Zeila on June 19, 2023, 04:59:37 PM● m. 30 LH beat 2 sounds like a D instead of G
I'm not hearing this, but I may be wrong
Quote from: Zeila on June 19, 2023, 04:59:37 PM● m. 10/17/18 were the beaming differences here compared to measures 9 or 11 intentional?
Also m33 & 34
  • I think I hear something along these lines for m41:
    You cannot view this attachment.
  • Quarter rests in the staff should have their bottom hook intersect a staff line, could you reposition the ones in m48 & m49?

Libera

Sorry for the long time to get back to everyone.  I really appreciate all of the feedback.  (Replies in-line to prevent this from being huge).

Quote from: Static on June 19, 2023, 11:23:06 AMNot much to say really. Looks great!

- m21 RH beat 1: Melody should be D A here instead of B F#. Oops.
- m24: The crescendo is just barely grazing the top of that sharp. Fixed.
- m25 RH beat 1: The grace note sounds like a D to me, like it's restruck on that beat.  Yeah, I guess I don't really like how that sounds on piano so I just removed the grace entirely.
- m40 LH beat 3.5: I hear the guitar playing an F# there (in the staff). The B is played by a string voice so you could put that in the RH. Sure.

Thanks Static!

Quote from: Zeila on June 19, 2023, 04:59:37 PMNice work on this!! I agree with most of Static's comments
I agree with this suggestion, but I hear a B played by the guitar as well. I think what happens is that sometimes there are two guitar notes at once, like what I hear in measure 26 for example
You cannot view this attachment. I think I like how it is now with the F# at the bottom.

Other than that, here's what I got:
  • How did you hide the rests in the first eight measures and very last measure to the point where they are completely invisible past the "hidden" markings? I don't even see anything with the note shape tool, nor do I see any kind of blank notation staff style. Btw, the way you did the courtesy key signature was quite elegant Staff style.  I thought I was being clever, apparently not...
  • m. 8 beat 3 sounds like it's just a quarter note. If the low A on beat 3.5 is just that quiet, then I think it should have parentheses or something else to signify that it's softer in comparison. The only type of sound I hear is an unpitched string release or something like that Yeah I do hear an A on beat 3.5 but it is very different aurally to the others, so I added some parenthesis.
  • m. 10/17/18 were the beaming differences here compared to measures 9 or 11 intentional? Nope, fixed.  Also I fixed 33/34.
  • m. 22 RH I hear B->A instead of D->C# under the top notes Fixed.
  • m. 25 I'm unsure, but I'm hearing something like this with a tiny pinch of rubato. The G is softer in comparison, and the RH could play the first two eighth notes
    You cannot view this attachment. Hmm.  I feel like the effect of this bit is that the music is pausing.
     Sure, I can kind of hear something going on but its nowhere near as definite as what follows later and I'd prefer to leave it like that.
  • m. 26 LH beat 3 as what I notated in the first picture, I think this is a D instead of a B, but idk Sure.
  • m. 30 LH beat 2 sounds like a D instead of G I don't hear it.  Maybe you're hearing the melody D?
  • m. 30 LH beat 3 there's a low F playing throughout the measure and I think it would sound better if you put one on beat 3. You could just have the RH take the G at the top (with split stems or a bracket to notate it unless you want to leave it ambiguous) so that the LH wouldn't have to play a 9th interval I'm not sure the F is needed really.  There's an F in the RH so the harmony is all there, and I'd like to keep the LH consistent where possible.
  • m. 33 LH beat 2.5 I'm hearing B#->D# instead of G#->A# I still hear what I wrote.  Maybe you're hearing the melody? (or a doubling thereof?)
  • m. 35-38/43-46 maybe you could put arpeggio markings on beat 1 in all or some of these measures I don't really hear the arpeggiation that strongly to warrant writing it in here.
  • m. 35/36 I do hear a high D on beat 3, but I hear one an octave lower too and feel like that's more prominent sounding to me You're completely right.  I got the contour of the melody wrong.  I think it doesn't help that the melody is soft and there is a high D# going on throughout in the strings.  It is much easier to hear the correct contour in Falling Petals!
  • m. 35 I think this has an A# in it too I don't hear it.  I think the G#m7 chord is fine and I'm not sure how to even voice the A# in a way that isn't distracting.
  • m. 36 much less sure about this one, but there is like a hint of dissonance that might be an E# here as well Similar to the above.
  • m. 37 I think there's a D# in the first chord that you could replace the E in the RH with Yep, sounds good.
  • m. 38 RH it sounds like there's a low D# in the first chord too. Just an observation really, I don't expect you to add it unless it's arpeggiated Yeah I don't think it's necessary here.
  • m. 38 LH beat 3 I think the last two notes are an An and F# I think it's actually a repeated F# but I didn't like how the repetition sounds on piano so I picked another note from the same chord for beat 3.5.  I think I'd prefer to leave it like that so that you don't have the bare octave on beat 3.
  • m. 41 I think it's more important to at least partially finish the melody phrase instead of prioritizing the high strings here. Here's one suggestion, although if you don't like how the voices kind of blend together then that's okay too!
    You cannot view this attachment. I can see where you're coming from, but I personally think it's more important to have the whole of the string line going into bar 43 with the cresc.  I'm also not a huge fan of how the parts would then blend together in bar 41.  I agree it's not ideal, but this is the compromise that I think is best.
  • m. 43 I hear an A# here too just like in measure 35 As above.
  • m. 45 I think there's a C# in that chord too I'd prefer to keep this consistent with how 37 is now, so without the C#.

Thanks Zeila!  It's really nice to see you around here again.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on July 19, 2023, 07:37:14 AM
  • m24: I think the B in the chord at beat 1 should, be an A, but I'm not sure. I do hear a string voice (A-G-A-B) on beats 2 and 3 which you could addd if you like I still hear the B and the A comes in on beat 1.5 so you still get the right sort of harmony almost immediately.  I'd prefer to leave it as-is.
  • m25: Alternatively to Zeila's suggestion, you could add just the low G on beat 2 (borrowed from a strings part) I like that.  You still get the pause, but it's a bit less empty.  I just put it in as part of the same LH line.
  • m27: I feel like you could let beat 3 stand out a bit more here, it has a more weighted feel in the original than in your sheet. Maybe a low F in the RH, or something to a similar effect? That was kind of the idea of how I wrote out the LH here.  Of course, the playback doesn't account for this.  But I don't see the harm in adding an extra F as well to help out, so sure.
  • I think I hear something along these lines for m41:
    You cannot view this attachment. I still hear what I wrote.
  • Quarter rests in the staff should have their bottom hook intersect a staff line, could you reposition the ones in m48 & m49? Sure.

Thanks Xiao!



Files updated!

[attachment deleted by admin]

XiaoMigros

For m41, maybe you could restrike the D# in the RH on beat 2, to finish off the piano part?

Everything else looks good, I don't know what I was hearing in the LH here...

Libera



Static


Zeta

This submission has been accepted by Static.

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