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[DELETED] [NDS] Hotel Dusk: Room 215 - "The Last Sleep" by JethroDL

Started by Zeta, August 07, 2022, 03:57:53 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Other
Game: Hotel Dusk: Room 215
Console: Nintendo DS
Title: The Last Sleep
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: JethroDL

Maelstrom

Welcome, and sorry it took so long to get you some feedback!
We encourage arrangers to immediately reply to their submissions with a link to the original song, which I grabbed for you here:
Some feedback:
I recommend checking our formatting guidelines. Since finale notepad has a habit of being horrifically limited, users here (and in the discord server) would be more than happy to help you edit it to meet our formatting guidelines.

But also, some feedback on the sheet's content
-I don't hear the pedal as constantly held throughout the entire piece. There's some parts where it just makes more sense for the performer to let it up. If you want to mark those, you can use the custom shape tool to do so (or just write con pedale/i] at the beginning of the piece)
-I don't hear the octave harmonies in the LH, and I hear those notes as an  octave higher. Don't think there's any reason not to write it that way.
-I hear harmonies on the final notes in RH phrases, mostly 6ths below the last held note
-The arpeggios aren't quite exactly notated. In measure 6 (m6), for example, the top note should be a mordent (the flourish up to the G is shorter than the other notes) and the last 2 notes longer (and a tied 32nd like that is a bad look when it could just be a 16th).
-Continuing the 8va from m8 to m9 to include the whole note would make the phrase easier to follow. Same idea with combining the m14-m15 8va.
-You could totally include the pad chords in m15-16 RH if you wanted.
-There's some small inaccuracies with the unusual arpeggios in the 2nd half, like how the notes leading up to the whole note in the 2nd to last measure actually start in that measure and not the measure before, but we can iron those issues out after we get the rest looking good.

That's what I've got now, but there might be a bit more once this is fixed up and I do a thorough check.

Again, glad to have you here, sorry it took so long for us to give you feedback.

wandergrunt

In my ears, the pedal isn't being kept down steadily throughout the duration of the performance. In certain cases, it's best if the performer relaxes a little. You may use the unique shape highlighter to designate them. It would be simpler to understand the sentence if the whole note were included. The same logic applies to joining the m14 and m15 8va. If you wanted to, you could even add in the pad chords in m15-16 RH.


dordle

Libera

Bump for arranger.  Are you available to work on this?

Libera