[DELETED] [3DS] WarioWare: Gold - "Pumpkin Panic Gallery" by Shiuster

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Super Mario
Game: WarioWare: Gold
Console: Nintendo 3DS
Title: Pumpkin Panic Gallery
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Shiuster

[LeviR.star]

Don't worry, updaters, Shiuster's working on uploading a non-extended version of the original song so he can paste it here.

EDIT: Here it is, he finished uploading it.

[Libera]

First things first, welcome!  It looks like you've got the formatting guidelines down, which is great!  Unfortunately, the arrangement itself has a rather large number of problems and frankly it doesn't really match the original very well at all.  Let me go into a bit more detail:

-The right hand arpeggios in bars 1-16 are not the correct notes or contour at all.  Have a close listen to what that high part is doing in the original and really try to get the pitches correct as what you have is not very accurate at all.
-The tempo is too low, it should be around 132 but there's fluctuations here and there.
-The right hand chords in bars 17-31 are not really correct either.  The chords change a lot more than you have written in here.  Once again, really take a close listen to the original and try to pick them out.  Using something like audiostretch can really help to lower the song by an octave, making those high up notes easier to pick out.
-That being said, in bars 17 onwards there's a lot more going on than just high chords and the melody and I'm not sure those are the best parts to pick for a piano arrangement.  Personally what I'd try and do is work the bass and chords into one left hand waltz style accompaniment part that it going to capture the harmony and the feel of the original much better.
-From bar 28 your arrangement really starts to deviate from the original, missing out almost everything apart from the melody and bar 32 doesn't sound like the original at all.  I ... don't really know what's happened here.
-You're missing a full eight bars of the original after bar 32 before it loops back to the start again.

I really don't like to be harsh, but this arrangement needs some serious work on it before it can be accepted.  If this is your first arrangement then perhaps it might be better to try something slightly easier and with less harmony if you're struggling to pick out the correct notes.  Working on relatively easy arrangements is the best way to get better at arranging, but if you really want to continue with this one then feel free too.  If you're getting stuck you can ask around on the forums or on discord for help, there's usually someone around willing to offer it.

I'm sorry if anything I said came off as overly mean, but I hope this helps in some way.

[Shiuster]

Hey Libera!

First off, thank you so much for taking the time to give me constructive feedback about my arrangement! I honestly wasn't sure what I was doing with the high notes as I don't think I have an ear for that yet. I knew I was off somewhere and I'm super glad that you pointed it out! I'm going to try again and see where I went wrong. I know this is my first arrangement and you did say that maybe I should find something easier if I have trouble picking out notes, but I'm not sure what could be easier and I definitely don't want to quit now and try later (because maybe I'll forget about it and never finish it).

I'll give it another shot. I know you're not trying to be mean and that you're really trying to help me out and I super appreciate that.

[Static]

maybe I'll forget about it

Bump for arranger! If you need help trying to edit the sheet because of NotePad's limitations, I or someone else can help you out with that.

[Libera]

I'm going to go ahead and archive this now.  Feel free to bring it back here or to a PA thread when you've had another shot at it (and if you need any more help ask away on discord or on the forums!)