Submission Information:
Series: Other
Game: ActRaiser
Console: Super Nintendo Entertainment System
Title: Fillmore (Act-1)
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Atcero (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=4216)
(https://media.tenor.com/gWRoYtw_NpwAAAAd/cat-cat-jam.gif)
Formatting and general comments- The title on page 2 is "Fillmore (A-1)" instead of "Fillmore (Act-1)." This would be more work for XML imports, but you can insert categories from the File Info (in this case, the title) so that every instance of the text is consistent and any edits would change all of them at once. To do this, you just have to open a text box, then go to the Text tab at the top and pick the Title from inserts. Inserts are super handy for writing in symbols like flats and naturals in text too
- I think this would look a bit more readable with staccato eighth notes on beats x.5 instead of the sixteenth note + sixteenth rest combo, particularly at measures 9-10, 14-15, 22, and 24 whenever there's an eighth rest right after the sixteenth rest
- m. 9 RH - beat 4 hide the natural in the 2nd layer because there's already a Bn earlier in the RH. The shortcut for toggling accidentals is Ctrl+Shift+(-) (dash/underscore)
- m. 10 RH - super nitpicky but the natural accidental is just barely colliding with the D on beat 3.75. If you want to, you can adjust this by editing the beat chart with the measure tool, but it really isn't that big of a deal. If you decide to change it, then you should do that last because using the Simple Entry Tool in that measure or adjusting the music spacing in any way would revert those changes
comparison
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1131697795951247491/image.png
vs
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1131697866298110012/image.png
- m. 19 RH - I think it would look better if you lowered the eighth note rest back to its default position (i.e. 6 steps down)
Notes- m. 2 - The think the melody stands out the most here, and I feel like there should be some way to include it for beat 4. I think this is what each voice is playing for reference, with the melody as the 2nd layer in the RH
full
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1131687264800485528/image.png
reduction
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1131695394213085244/image.png
- m. 3 RH - beats 1-2 there are offbeat D's above the G's here, which is also much easier to play. The ones on beats 3-4 are still G's on top though
- m. 3 LH - I would recommend getting rid of the upper eighth note layer that goes G->Ab and changing the inner layer (D->Eb->F->F#) to quarter notes. It's already pretty dense, and the G at beat 4 is dissonant against the F#. If anything, I would rather add the parallel 6ths in the RH like so, but I think that's likely too difficult to justify adding
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1131687689633140787/image.png - m. 5/7 RH - beat 4 & 4.5 I think both eighth notes sound staccato
- m. 11/15 RH - why did you separate the layers in measures 9/10/etc., but not here?
- m. 12 RH - beat 2.5 you could add a low G under the Eb as a substitute for the 16th note run that goes G->Ab. If you'd rather leave it out because of the jump, then that's okay too. Here's a picture in case my explanation is confusing
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1131700092026507314/image.png - m. 16 RH - beat 2.5 there's a G above the Eb this time since the melody is going back up again
- m. 17-20 - I think it would be nice to mix up the dynamics here in order to accentuate the build-up in measures 19/20. So one idea could be to make measure 17 mezzo forte or even mezzo piano and add a crescendo in measures 19/20. Another idea could be to add a decrescendo in measure 18, make measure 19 mf or mp, and add a crescendo in measures 19 and/or 20. Measure 21 would just go back to forte. If you don't like either idea, then that's okay too
- m. 19 RH - it sounds like there are D's playing too, and even if they're just part of a sample, it would be nice to add them as half notes under the 2nd layer
- m. 20 LH - beat 1 you could add a low G here since it's part of the quarter note arpeggio build-up
- m. 20 RH - you could add the notes Eb->G->D in the middle of beats 2-4 respectively to give it a bit more impact. Basically something like this:
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1131688041044525116/image.png
Got that all updated minus the M3 left hand just for now, thanks so much! Yeah when I merge the layers sometimes I do miss some notes sadly so thanks for catching those :catjam:
I don't think I'm seeing any changes in the files, unfortunately
Quote from: XiaoMigros on August 07, 2023, 05:27:51 AMI don't think I'm seeing any changes in the files, unfortunately
Idk about the midi/pdf files, but the mus file was definitely updated. It's just that a few things were missed and the intro octave ranges were changed (which also made the F# octave in measure 2 not as awkward to play/include). For the record, I think the changes made to the intro are fine with the exception of the 8va placement. I think that could be moved a little towards the left so that it covers the Eb more. The accidentals on beat 4 of measure 2 are also a bit too close to each other, and you can adjust the music spacing by clicking anywhere on the staff with the Simple Entry Tool so that it reverts back to the automatic spacing
Quote from: Zeila on July 20, 2023, 05:49:40 PMm. 9 RH - beat 4 hide the natural in the 2nd layer because there's already a Bn earlier in the RH. The shortcut for toggling accidentals is Ctrl+Shift+(-) (dash/underscore)
It looks like updating beat 4 made beat 4.75 stand out instead. That one needs to go too
Quote from: Zeila on July 20, 2023, 05:49:40 PMm. 11/15 RH - why did you separate the layers in measures 9/10/etc., but not here?
This was still unaddressed, whether through an explanation on why it's different or a change in layer formatting to match with measures 10/14
Also, I noticed that some parts of the left hand were inconsistent:
- Measure 14 is using the old sixteenth note + rest combo on beat 4.5 instead of a staccato eighth note like in measures 5/7/etc.
- Measure 22 is missing a staccato on beat 1.5
- Measure 23 uses a staccato eighth note on beat 2.25 while measure 21 uses sixteenth notes/rests. I think either rhythm is fine--maybe leaning towards measure 21 given that the RH is doing constant sixteenth notes--and the issue with rests isn't really present in this figure compared to rhythms with sixteenth rests on beat x.75 right before another rest. Also, sixteenth notes should be beamed across rests if the rests are in between two notes and they're all under the same beat. I don't think it's necessary to extend the beam across hanging rests, and that would conflict with the first layer anyways
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1138202580707709018/image.png
One last thing, but you could center staccatos along the notehead rather than on stem side. Personally I think I prefer stem-side, especially for cases where staccatos only apply to
one layer in between the staves, but there are
good arguments (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?topic=11591.0) for aligning staccatos notehead side instead. Either method is acceptable, I'm just presenting more options in case you weren't aware
random made-up example in between staves
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1138202277539225662/image.png
notehead -> stem
fillmore
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1138202505981997056/image.png
notehead -> stem
Got that all updated, dw why the other two didnt update but hopefully thats all fixed!
Also if I miss things its cause my blonde kicks in and I apologize :cri: its not intentional I swear I just get busy and miss things and forget to go back to them.
For the staccatos, my Finale is just broken so I just kinda usually ignore those till the very end since they will always break on export to .mus for some reason sadly from full finale.
EDIT: the M20 RH Eb did not work for a note from the original harmony so I changed it to a D on further listening.
Hiya, sorry for the wait on this one!
Throughout the sheet, I think there's mostly something to be done about the L.H., since it's very tiring to play in its current state because of the amount of repeated notes in the L.H., as well as a couple of bars that just have a lot going on in them, which will make it very hard or near impossible to play together with the R.H. Here are some tips:
-m2: I don't really hear a lot going on in the original for this L.H. part: I only hear the bass play the F#'s on beat 1 and 3, and an organ D on beat 2. Aside from the melody I can hear a countermelody part, but since it's quite soft and about as busy as the melody, I don't think the arrangement necessarily needs it included. tl;dr maybe you could do something like this:
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/863709312067829811/1147467734616133632/image.png
-m3: This is one of the measures that are near impossible to play at speed: the pinky has to do a LOT of work to play all those G's, while the thumb and index finger have to play a voice each too. I think the most prominent part I can hear is the trade-off between G's and Ab's in the bass. You can add high G's in between those, so the L.H. and R.H. mirror each other's movements, which makes it a easier to play, as well as keeping the chaotic nature of this measure:
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/863709312067829811/1147468557639221299/image.png
-m4-16 (as well as m20): This whole section has the repeated-pinky thing going on, which is easily fixed with using another chord tone (usually the 5th from the bass note, sometimes the 6th whenever you see an An on Bn in the L.H.) instead of repeating the root notes. Whenever you're dealing with a fast piece, it's best to avoid repeated notes as much as possible.
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/863709312067829811/1147468978160156672/image.png
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/863709312067829811/1147468958837002311/image.png
-m21-24: Playing the softer organ voice in the middle of the L.H. is quite hard in combination with the rhythmically heavy slap bass part. Personally I think I'd leave out the organ voice, as it's quite soft and doesn't add as much as the slap bass part does. Make sure to write the G#'s in m22 and 24 as Ab's btw, those are already in the key signature.
As for the rest of the arrangement:
-m2: Is there a specific reason the octave sign is here in beat 3-4? I don't hear the orchestra hit part an octave higher, and it makes the jumps up and down very hard to play.
-m6 and 8: I think you could leave out the 16th runs on beat 3-4, as they're pretty hard to play (especially if you wanna hold down the C in the melody), and they're not as prominent in the original. The bass part does a good enough job of filling out the empty space.
-m9: The run in thirds on beat 4 is pretty hard to play at this speed. Maybe you can just keep in the Bn on beat 4 and remove the other 16ths? It'll be easier to end the run in beat 1 of m10 on just the C and (high) Eb, but you can keep the low Eb in if you want.
-m18: The Gb in the R.H. on beat 1.75 should be an F#
Sorry for taking so long to get back on this, thanks for the feedback!
A couple things tho that I did differently:
Quote-m2: I don't really hear a lot going on in the original for this L.H. part: I only hear the bass play the F#'s on beat 1 and 3, and an organ D on beat 2. Aside from the melody I can hear a countermelody part, but since it's quite soft and about as busy as the melody, I don't think the arrangement necessarily needs it included. tl;dr maybe you could do something like this:
I like filling out the chords more if possible with simpler bass sections, so if possible I would like to keep the Ab (quarter) and the F# octave.
For m3, I did the pattern but did keep some of the more original notes, let me know if this doesnt work.
Quote-m4-16 (as well as m20): This whole section has the repeated-pinky thing going on, which is easily fixed with using another chord tone (usually the 5th from the bass note, sometimes the 6th whenever you see an An on Bn in the L.H.) instead of repeating the root notes. Whenever you're dealing with a fast piece, it's best to avoid repeated notes as much as possible.
m4-16, I instead opted for an octave pattern rather than the added 5th/6th chord.
Quote-m21-24: Playing the softer organ voice in the middle of the L.H. is quite hard in combination with the rhythmically heavy slap bass part. Personally I think I'd leave out the organ voice, as it's quite soft and doesn't add as much as the slap bass part does.
I opted to merge it with the bass as I would love to keep the organ, as I know in a lot of remixes and orchestral remixes (i know I'm not arranging those but) tend to have it more prominent.
Quote-m6 and 8: I think you could leave out the 16th runs on beat 3-4, as they're pretty hard to play (especially if you wanna hold down the C in the melody), and they're not as prominent in the original. The bass part does a good enough job of filling out the empty space.
I did up the Ab to make it hopefully easier to play. I do at least want to keep the second run of D F G, but understand if both still should be removed.
Quote-m9: The run in thirds on beat 4 is pretty hard to play at this speed. Maybe you can just keep in the Bn on beat 4 and remove the other 16ths? It'll be easier to end the run in beat 1 of m10 on just the C and (high) Eb, but you can keep the low Eb in if you want.
Opted to do two 8th notes of the B on beat 4 and and a C on beat 4.5.
Thanks again!
Sorry for taking even longer to respond!
Quote from: Atcero on October 21, 2023, 02:34:09 PMFor m3, I did the pattern but did keep some of the more original notes, let me know if this doesnt work.
I still think this is a bit too much for the L.H., mostly because the thumb has to move between a white and a black key, which adds a lot more uncomfortable movement. I think I'd still suggest the pattern I posted.
Quote from: Atcero on October 21, 2023, 02:34:09 PMm4-16, I instead opted for an octave pattern rather than the added 5th/6th chord.
That works too! For m5 though I think it's best to have a different note on beat 4 at least: at this speed, I think it's best to leave repeated notes to a max of 2 if absolutely necessary. Similarly in m20
Quote from: Atcero on October 21, 2023, 02:34:09 PMI opted to merge it with the bass as I would love to keep the organ, as I know in a lot of remixes and orchestral remixes (i know I'm not arranging those but) tend to have it more prominent.
That's okay, this works too! Make sure to write the G#'s in m22 and 24 as Ab's btw, and I think you meant the C in m23 beat 4.25 to be an octave lower like in m21?
Quote from: Atcero on October 21, 2023, 02:34:09 PMI did up the Ab to make it hopefully easier to play. I do at least want to keep the second run of D F G, but understand if both still should be removed.
Measure 8 is doable now (though still on the tough side), but m6 is still quite hard to play as a lead into m7. I at least can't really figure out a comfortable fingering for that part, which will make the required jumps hard to play at speed.
Quote from: Atcero on October 21, 2023, 02:34:09 PMOpted to do two 8th notes of the B on beat 4 and and a C on beat 4.5.
That works too, though I'd suggest then removing the bottom Eb in m10, as it's near impossible to get the thumb there on time.
Got that all updated, thank ya!
There's one thing I seem to have missed, it's a Finale thing with layers: in m6 and 8, the flat of the Ab is missing on beat 3 in the R.H. Aside from that I'm happy to approve so another updater can take a look!
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/895351643024015360/906174785795522560/BloopActuallyApproves.png
Just doing a bit of a skim, couple things I heard/saw
• m18 upper octave that 2nd F# accidental is unnecessary, but did that happen when doing your MuseScore conversion?
• m22 RH beat 4.0 hearing a Dn and 4.25 a Bn (octave lower than 4.5)
Thank you both so much, got that all updated! And regarding m22, I actually had that in my OG file and the rest of beast 4 is supposed to be the Dn then 3 Bns
Just popping in for a little peek! Not a thorough check, but just a couple of things I noticed while looking. Apologies in advance if these have already been discussed before.
- Some staccatos are out of place on the PDF export (e.g. m. 5, maybe 7, 8, 11-12). You can highlight them and press backspace to reset their position.
- The system consisting of m. 19-20 is rather stretched out by comparison, since m. 19 is sparse. I'd suggest putting a 2-measure system somewhere earlier in the piece (like on page 1) where there are constant 16th note runs instead.
Quote from: Zeila on August 07, 2023, 02:35:46 PM- Measure 23 uses a staccato eighth note on beat 2.25 while measure 21 uses sixteenth notes/rests. I think either rhythm is fine--maybe leaning towards measure 21 given that the RH is doing constant sixteenth notes--and the issue with rests isn't really present in this figure compared to rhythms with sixteenth rests on beat x.75 right before another rest. Also, sixteenth notes should be beamed across rests if the rests are in between two notes and they're all under the same beat. I don't think it's necessary to extend the beam across hanging rests, and that would conflict with the first layer anyways
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/892557518759415858/1138202580707709018/image.png
Was this suggestion taken or reverted? I was going to suggest that separating out layers here would make it more apparent what's moving where
Quote from: Zeila on July 20, 2023, 05:49:40 PMm. 11/15 RH - why did you separate the layers in measures 9/10/etc., but not here?
This too, I was a bit confused at why there's an F in the upper layer on beat 3 when there's a lower layer it could be in instead
Yeah those staccatos always get me. The other stuff you posted about was taken care of or edited (minus a stray staccato in m24) other than the measure distribution which I got fixed up. Thanks so much!
Sorry correct me if I'm wrong, for m11-15 the F's on beat 3 doesn't appear to have been addressed, and what were your thoughts on Latios's recommendation about splitting out m21-24's LH into two layers?
Quote from: Latios212 on December 29, 2023, 02:55:18 PMWas this suggestion taken or reverted? I was going to suggest that separating out layers here would make it more apparent what's moving where
Edit: I also just noticed after looking a little better this time that the Tempo marking is in the Engraver font and not Maestro times for the notehead/ Times New Roman for the value
Missed the m11-15 the first time got that added!
For the splitting m21-24, in a previous post, I said I merged it to reduce confusion. Thank ya!
Okay I see now I should've looked earlier than Latios' post. One reallly small last thing that tempo notehead is 12pt when it should be 16pt
Got that updated, thank you!
Thank you for updating that, I will now accept
This submission has been accepted by Kricketune54 (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=6528).
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